Like everyone else, I go through seasons where I doubt myself and my effectiveness.
When you have a public ministry, you constantly have people in your ear saying things like…
I wish you preached more like this…
I wish you counseled like this….
I wish you led like….
I wish you interacted like this…
I wish you spent your time like this…
It’s easy to start to doubt and wonder if you should be more this or that. Last week, I spent some time with some crazy gifted friends and as I watched them do their thing, it made me doubt even further.
I spent an evening with my friend, Steven Furtick, at his church in Charlotte. As I watched him masterfully lead worship and then preach his guts out it made me think….I need that kind of charisma. If I had his charisma, I could be so much more effective. That was Wednesday night.
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Then on Friday, I found myself in a round table conversation with my friends Chris Seay and Len Sweet, which was being video taped for a future small group curriculum. The whole time we talked I felt like I needed a dictionary. These guys are not only incredible ministers of the Gospel, but they’re unbelievably smart.
I couldn’t keep up. I didn’t understand half of what they were talking about. I honestly walked away wondering if I was even smart enough to be in ministry.
I say all of this not to invoke some kind of sympathy. I’m just letting you know what goes on in my head because I bet these things go on in your head as well.