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How to Live Missionally in the Suburbs

But the Holy Spirit contended with that. He engaged me in my hideout and compelled me to stand up and walk to the door. Many times, the result was a needy friend sitting on my sofa, engaging in honest conversation. It’s stunning to recall the hard things I’ve been led to say to Alicia; more amazing still are her responses. I’ve interrupted her in the middle of devastating fights with her teenage son, and she has received that as help rather than criticism. My husband and I have told her that she isn’t healthy enough to be involved in a romantic relationship, and she has responded by admitting addiction to men who misbehave. I’ve counseled her to apologize to her children for her own impatience—without telling them what they’ve done to deserve it—and she has done it. Not perfectly, but sincerely. I finally told her to rip that ridiculous sign off her door, and she went downstairs and did it; she just needed someone to remind her who she is in Christ. God would not introduce her as “Alicia, my disabled daughter.”

Mission from a Greater Refuge

The only possible explanation for Alicia’s ready response to all of this is the radical regeneration of the Holy Spirit—not just in her, but in me as well. I am so humbled when I watch God at work in her life; she makes me praise him for his power and grace. I believe him more because of my relationship with Alicia, though it’s the hardest friendship I have. She has apologized to me a lot. I’ve had to apologize plenty, too: for withdrawing from her, for speaking impatiently to Tina, for lacking the energy to follow through on a promise. And amazingly, Alicia forgives me with the same grace she’s been shown. Isn’t it just like God to raise new life from the ashes?

When we first became part of Soma Communities, we attended a weekend retreat for missional community leaders. I distinctly remember hearing one of our elders say, “Your home is not your refuge. Who is your refuge?” And we all knew the answer: Jesus is our refuge. When I am hidden in him with his perfect strength flowing through my weakness, I can engage my neighbors. And even as I am on mission among them, he is on mission in me. As a result, our family talks a lot about the Gospel these days, and it’s bringing healing inside our home and beyond our front door. It may not be the home we thought we wanted, but we’re convinced it’s the one we need.