A few months ago, I wrote about the ministry unhealthiness my husband and I had allowed to creep in and how it had affected us as individuals and as a couple. I wanted to address it openly because personal unhealthiness is such a common issue, especially in church planting. But I think in doing so, I may have scared a few of you in the process!
Brittany wrote and said, “In all honesty, this post makes me nervous. My husband and I are leaving in under a year [to church plant]. What can I begin to put into practice now as a wife and we as a couple [to prepare]?”
To Brittany and to all those cowering under the weight of my words, here’s how I would answer that question:
1. Please don’t be nervous. God called you, and He will give you what you need to fulfill this calling. My favorite church planting verse says this very thing: “He who called you is faithful, and He will do it” (1 Thessalonians 5:24).
2. Don’t be nervous, but don’t be naive either. You’re headed to the front lines, and there should be some holy trepidation as you go forward as a steward of the gospel. So you must cling to the Conqueror who leads you to the front lines. If you aren’t daily in the Word, do whatever it takes to make this is a priority. I’m not talking about rote Bible reading, I’m talking about heart dependence on the Person of God. God and His gospel are what will hold you when all other securities fail.
3. Remind yourself daily Who it is that builds and sustains the church. Hint: It’s not you or your husband. Recalling this truth will save you from the most destructive of sins (pursuing success to the detriment of your family and marriage) and the deepest of discouragements.
4. Embrace the adventure of it all. This is faith in action! Forget what is behind and strain toward what is ahead as soon as possible.
5. As a couple, commit together to priorities for your souls, your marriage and your children. When will you spend time in the Word? When will you spend time together? Will this time be used to talk about the church? How will you save money to do fun things as a family? What are your individual needs and how can the other help meet those throughout this process?
6. Begin connecting with other pastors and pastor’s wives in the city you’ll be planting in. Develop relationships and friendships. Ask them questions about the city, about the culture, about church planting, and LISTEN. Plan to be a team player in your city.
