Reaching Men

A few years ago, I read Why Men Hate Going to Church, and that book influenced our ministry at Oak Leaf Church.  I learned that reaching men takes a philosophical commitment and a determined intentionality.  Here’s some things that we’ve learned about leading a church that wants to reach men.

1. All men aren’t redneck hunters who drive pickup trucks. When you play up this stereotype, you leave behind a ton of men, who express their masculinity in some other way.  I’d say our church service is very attractive to men, and I routinely make fun of NASCAR, hunting, and the state of Alabama.

2. A lot of men are scared of small groups. There’s not a whole lot of things that sound less fun than sitting around a room full of strangers and talking about your feelings.  This is probably not a true perception, but it’s a perception nevertheless.  If small group are your only opportunity for discipleship and relationship, you might leave a lot of men behind.

3. Singing in public isn’t cool for a lot of guys. Lyrics like “sloppy wet kisses” and other poetic, touchy-feely songs that make Jesus sound like prom date.  Nothing wrong with singing (it’s Biblical!), but if you want to reach men, then you’ve got to be sensitive to this stuff.

4. Easter lilies and pastel colors on the printed pieces attract women. Nothing wrong with this, but you can toughen up some of your graphics a bit and speak to more people.

5. Children’s ministry isn’t just for women. At Oak Leaf Church, we’ve tried hard to challenge men to step up and provide leadership in family ministry environments.  It might be a worthwhile exercise for your church to come up with a list of the top ten volunteer opportunities for men.

6. Don’t take it to the extreme. I know of churches so focused on reaching men that they don’t let women on the stage.  That’s silly and just plain wrong.  You don’t have to offend women in order to reach men.  Being a male chauvinist isn’t spiritual.

7. Men speak a funny language. Add a little personality and humor to your services, because guys like to laugh.  Actually, most people like to laugh and humor is a universal language.