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Do You Make These 4 Mistakes When Disagreeing?

by Heather Goodman 

If you’re in a conversation with someone about some way of thinking you think they need to see from your perspective, the following statements are unhelpful and bad form:

1. “You can only understand what I’m saying by revelation.” (Gee, what are they supposed to do with THAT?)

2. “You need to go research a bit and then come back and talk to me.” (How do you know they haven’t researched this topic more than YOU and *still* see it differently than you do? Don’t make assumptions!)

3. “You need to stop thinking so much/get out of your head/stop being so intellectual about this.” (What that usually means is that you are weak at explaining your position, so you’d rather the person just swallow what you are trying to teach them without thinking much about it.)

4. “I used to think like you on that topic – but God set me free.” (Do you know how this sets up your own experience/perception as the authority and puts the other person beneath you as you are the expert and they are still in your prior “childish” state?)