Every teenager you work with suffers. Suffering is a common experience we all share, yet it is one that we talk very little about in the church world. It’s no wonder why we avoid talking about suffering. It’s uncomfortable, it hurts and there are no answers that bring about a resolution to suffering this side of heaven. I can fix a lot of things, but I can’t fix suffering. So, we prefer to ignore it, pretend it is gone with the passage of time, or numb ourselves to it with our favorite distraction.
Suffering is a central theme of the Bible, yet it’s one that occupies far too little of our time in youth ministry. Many proclaim a desire to bring the Gospel to the lost as Paul did; precious few care to join him in his prison cell. And because we ignore Jesus’ call to suffer with him as he did, we also lead others astray in the area of suffering. If every teenager we encounter suffers, then suffering is a topic we have to get right when we teach, counsel, mentor and lead. Unfortunately, I believe we get it wrong more often than not. Here are four lies we tell teenagers about their suffering:
Lie #1: Jesus will alleviate your suffering. Jesus does not always alleviate our suffering—he didn’t even do it for Paul! (See 2 Corinthians 12:7-10), and that through our suffering, we can help others. But God does not allow a woman to be raped just so that she can help another woman one day who has gone through something similar. Stop saying stupid things.
Lie #3: God doesn’t give you more than you can handle. I’m pretty sure the “Bible verse” that brought us this gem is in the same passage as “God helps those who help themselves.” If I could handle it, I wouldn’t need God.
Lie #4: Following Jesus means less suffering. I’m not even sure where to start, except to suggest to anyone who believes this to read the Gospels. Then the rest of the New Testament. And then the entire Bible.
What other lies do we tell teenagers about suffering?
