4. DEFINE THE GROUP LEADER’S ROLE. The leader’s role is critical in the success of a small group. Most adults who teach children’s Sunday school are used to leading small classes of kids. Small group leadership, however, requires a different style. A small group leader’s role is more of a facilitator or a coach than a teacher.
“Bear” Bryant, the winningest coach in football history, understood the basic principle of effective coaching. If you truly love and care about the kids you coach, you’ll bring out the best they have to offer. The same is true of coaching kids in a small group. The primary concern is making sure that kids feel loved, accepted, and connected.
5. SET GROUND RULES. Make children and their parents aware of expectations and guidelines before your groups meet. Set meeting times, and honor those times.
Confidentiality is also critical to your group’s success. Children aren’t likely to open up and share without knowing that what’s been shared remains within the group. Be clear with kids, however, and let them know that if any information is shared that indicates possible harm to themselves or another individual, you’ll need to talk to the appropriate people.
6. FIND SPACE FOR YOUR SMALL GROUPS. Where are the small groups going to meet? “The ideal situation is to have a room for each group, but that isn’t realistic for most churches,” says James. “You have to think out of the box. We had small groups meeting in hallways, foyers, courtyards, playgrounds, and anywhere else we could fit. Small groups aren’t confined to a classroom and can be flexible to fit most situations.”
Timely Tips
Use these small group tips from the FW Friends midweek program.
- Learn kids’ names immediately. Greeting kids by name lets them know they’re important to you.
- Praise in public; challenge in private. If you need to talk to a child about a behavior issue, do it apart from the group. Doing so communicates respect and lessens the likelihood for a child to feel the need to “save face.”
- See a child’s world from his or her view. There’s no such thing as a trivial problem. Even if you know it’s something that’ll blow over in a couple of days, give it the proper attention. Ask questions and help the child explore potential solutions.
- Celebrate kids’ successes. Make a big deal out of kids’ successes. Applaud kids frequently, and be their cheerleader.
- Communicate with kids. Call kids when they miss a meeting to let them know you missed them. Frequently send postcards. Be specific in your message so kids know it’s directly to them and not the same message to everyone else.
- Give kids opportunities. Expect kids to do and be their best, but don’t expect perfection. Kids learn by leading. Giving them opportunities to lead encourages them. You’ll also find they listen to each other better after they’ve taken turns in some sort of leadership capacity.
- Relax and have fun. Let kids know you care by being yourself, but don’t try to be “one of the kids.” Kids are relying on you to be their leader, not their playmate. If you relax, you’ll have fun — and so will they.
