So Joshua called together the twelve men he had appointed from the Israelites, one from each tribe, and said to them, “Go over before the ark of the Lord your God into the middle of the Jordan. Each of you is to take up a stone on his shoulder, according to the number of the tribes of the Israelites, to serve as a sign among you. In the future, when your children ask you, ‘What do these stones mean?’ tell them that the flow of the Jordan was cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord. When it crossed the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. These stones are to be a memorial to the people of Israel forever.” (Joshua 4:4-7 NIV)
Too many American children are mentored in a feminine world. They grow up in homes, schools, and churches led and taught by women. Children have more than a 98 percent chance that their primary schoolteachers, baby-sitters, and day-care givers will be women.1 The situation is no different in the church. Most Sunday school teachers, nursery workers, and children’s church leaders are also women. We may wonder how society would be affected if children had more experiences with men as teachers and spiritual mentors.
Physiologists and psychologists say, generally speaking, that each half of the brain performs specific functions. The right brain specializes in creative things: painting, writing, innovation, and imagination. The left brain deals with cognitive and logical functions: language, numbers, and scientific concepts. The key to mental effectiveness is maintaining a balance between the two extremes of logic and creativity. Although neither of these functions can be fairly assigned to any one gender, their interdependence and balance illustrates our children’s present need for both male and female Christian workers. Just as we would never desire to be wholly dominated by either left- or right-brain functions, so the discipleship of our children must also be balanced between the unique contributions of both male and female workers.
How can one address the need and unique contribution of male teachers without implying that men are more effective, desirable, or capable than female teachers? Clearly, we need both men and women in the discipleship of children. However, anyone who is involved in church work can attest to the shortage of men who are committed to discipling children. Men are not more effective; they are just more needed. It is time for men to overcome the obstacles and observe the outcome of involvement in children’s ministry.
OVERCOMING THE OBSTACLES
Stereotyping is probably the most formidable obstacle that discourages male involvement in children’s discipleship. Men often view ministering to children as women’s work. Anyone can do it with little or no training. This view has boomeranged. Some women now feel that men are not capable of working with children. This female-dominated workforce has at times failed to recognize men as significant contributors in the spiritual lives of children.
Image consciousness is another hurdle for men. The rewards, recognition, and respect for children’s workers are not as high as they are in other areas of ministry. One pastor told about a man named David in his church who overcame this obstacle. The pastor said, “One of the greatest blessings of my pastorate was a man in my church who surprised us when he said he and his wife wanted to work together in the nursery. I’d walk by and see David on the floor playing and talking with the children. He was just loving the children, and they were loving him. After a couple of years, he was elected to the church board. But he is still serving in the nursery because he has his Kingdom priorities figured out.”2
Isolation can also become an obstacle to men. Because male workers are in a minority, they may feel awkward and isolated by the absence of other males.
A lack of challenge often faces men when their involvement is limited to either disciplinary roles or those associated with physical and manual aspects of the ministry rather than spiritual nurturing.
Fear is currently the greatest stumbling block to male involvement in children’s discipleship. Society’s hypersensitivity to pedophilia has caused men to feel apprehensive about having any interest in children or in showing affection toward them.
The most important thing to remember about these obstacles is that they are easily overcome once men understand that the rewards of their involvement far outweigh the cost of overcoming any of the hindrances. The rewards bring us to the second reason why children need men involved in their discipleship.
