âFor my first baptism, I started from the middle of the tank instead of moving them to one end. I hit their head on the wall. Thankfully, not too hard. I had to re-do it. Everyone else was very nervous when they got in.â
âWhen I was baptized in High School, I was 6â1 275 lineman. The senior pastor, I do mean senior pastor had a bad back. When he dunked me my foot slip and kicked up, we baptized all the choir on the one side. The pastor feeling me slip, pulled me up as quickly as he could, we baptized the rest of the choir that missed the first round.â
âWe celebrated baptisms in our local river. One time, We were baptizing my then 8-year-old daughter. (AWESOME) But she was a kid, so I had to squat down as we put her in the water. When I raised her back up, my wet trunks stayed down. Yep. I mooned everyone on the riverbank.â
âSomeone accidentally left the submersible heater in between our morning and evening service. When we arrived there the water was steaming significantly. It was WAY too hot for anyone to enter. As the service began I had to run up to the petrol station and buy bags and bags of ice to try and cool the water down. The congregation thought I was playing a cruel prank on those getting baptized.â
âUsed a portable baptistery where I stood outside and person inside. Like a big jacuzzi tub. Guy getting baptized was 6â7â and almost 400 pounds. Sat down and water came to top of the tub. Told him to let me lower him down and not to throw himself back. As you can guess, when the time came, he fell backward and you could watch the wave rising out of the pool. It hit the end and completely drenched the worship leader who was standing there from head to knees. I almost didnât get him back up I was laughing so hard!â
âWe had a guy wear all white clothing because he felt purity in his newfound faith. However, he was dark-skinned, hyper muscular, and attractive. As he came out of the water, you could see almost everything underneath his clothes. Many eyes needed baptism afterward.â
âAt my church we asked baptism candidates to share their testimony. It was a bilingual church and the person testified âĂl me dio un corazĂłn de carne,â which was translated âHe gave me a heart of meat,â which set all the bilingual among us to laughterâShe meant âa heart of flesh.’â
âMy husband was baptizing our son. His first baptism. As he dunked my son, he was looking toward the audience. When he raised him up, he looked at him and quickly realized he didnât actually submerge my son. He quickly dunked him again. Everyone chuckled. Many people told him after it’s a special blessing.â
âMy dad once baptized and lady in a moo moo dress. Unfortunately, he positioned her down current and the flow of water lifted the dress entirely over her head turning inside out, exposing her under garments to everyone on the riverbank.â
âI baptized a baby named âAxel Cruz.â At the moment of baptism, I accidentally called him âAxel Roseâ [The Guns Nâ Roses lead singer]. The congregation couldnât stop laughingâand yes, thereâs a video on YouTube.
âForgot to turn on the heater for the water. Lady had a hip replacement, water was too cold and the hip kicked up. She basically pulled me down into the water with her. Then promised to never backslide if I promised she never had to be baptized again!â