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Christian Dating: Are There Any Rules Anymore?

2. You Want a Man to Ask You Out?

Then be around. Go to parties, hang out with friends in group settings, get to know other single people. And here’s a scandalous idea that I’m sure someone will disagree with, but oh well: try flirting. I don’t mean wear a push-up bra and sit on his lap. I mean smile, be interested, be interesting, ask questions, touch his shoulder, laugh at his jokes. It’s like bees to honey, baby.

3. Dating Does Not Inevitably Lead to Sin.

God may not be calling you to date someone in particular, but that doesn’t mean that He has said to not date anyone at all. There is also a camp among Christians who fear dating. They think it will turn into a tempting situation (which it could), or that God hasn’t “called” them to date anyone (which may be true).

4. Dating Does Not Inevitably Lead to Marriage.

Many people refuse to get a cup of coffee with someone of the opposite sex for fear that sipping a caffeinated beverage is a precursor to chapel bells and flower girls. Just because you went on a (as in singular) date with someone does not mean they are the person you are going to marry. And if they think you are their future spouse as the result of one date, run away—quickly. You wouldn’t want to marry a kook like that anyway.

All too often believers over-spiritualize dating and try turning it into some kind of holy act. It’s not. It’s a date. Boy meets girl. Boy likes girl. Girl likes boy. Boy asks girl on a date. Simple. Over-thinking it leads to discontent single people who wonder when and where the “right one” is instead of going on a date to actually find out.

What did I miss in the Christian dating world? What are or were your frustrations with the Christian dating scene? What have you learned that works or doesn’t work?


This article on Christian dating originally appeared here, and is used by permission.