I was so convicted, and at that moment I was also reminded of something I had been reading earlier that day in Scripture: “Love is patient, love is kind and gentle, not quick to anger…” (1 Corinthians 13). So there I was with the Holy Spirit and with Scripture, and it was so clear to me the prompting that I had: “Get up, walk back two seats and apologize to that guy. Get up out of your seat while there is still time, and you go back to him and you apologize.”
I thought, But I don’t want to!
Yet I knew what Scripture said, I knew I had just acted like a jerk, and I had this deep, unmistakable Holy Spirit-generated conviction running through me telling me to get up and go.
Hit the “pause” button with me for a minute. This truly was a pivotal moment where a lot more was on the line than you might think. I had already taken a step back spiritually over the last 45 minutes, and here was a chance to reclaim ground that I had already lost. In terms of being filled with the Holy Spirit, at that moment I was leaking pretty badly. And that’s what “be being filled” is about—moment by moment, choice by choice, prompting by prompting.
Okay, hit “play.” I got up, walked back the two seats, and suddenly loomed over the man unexpectedly. He flinched. It’s embarrassing to say this, but he probably thought I was coming to do anything but apologize. I leaned over to him and said: “You know, it’s been a long day and we’re all tired, and I really acted like a jerk back there. I’m sorry and I need to ask for your forgiveness.”
Then I held out my hand for a shake.
He was obviously stunned. But he shook my hand and said, “No worries.”
Now this is not a “me being a hero story;” it’s a “me being a jerk story.” It feels like there are a thousand times when I don’t follow the Spirit’s promptings. But the point is that when I do, I am keeping in step with the Spirit. It’s like we’re this big block of granite, and the more that we allow the Holy Spirit as Sculptor to work, chipping away at us, the more the image of Jesus begins to materialize through the stone.
But the work of the Holy Spirit is not just direction and guidance, promptings and convictions. The Holy Spirit provides the raw power, the raw experience of God that we need to follow through. Our effort toward coming to life, becoming more and more like Jesus, is not just a human effort. Had it not been for the power of the Holy Spirit in me I would never have gotten out of my seat and walked back those two rows of seats. So it’s not just human effort. It is our effort combining with the power and presence of the Holy Spirit in our lives. That’s how you unleash the Holy Spirit in your life.
And again, it’s deeply relational.
This is why the Bible talks about grieving the Holy Spirit through our sin. Think about it this way: He’s trying to make you more like Jesus. He’s leading, guiding and prompting you toward that end. When you give in to patterns of sin, or when you leave sin unconfessed and unaddressed in your life, then you are turning the Holy Spirit away, shutting Him out, refusing His work.
You are rejecting Him.
