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Which Nutty Christians to Unfriend on Facebook

  • Christian motivational speaker? Um, “motivational speaker” is code for “I’m going to constantly send you personal messages to join my multi-level marketing pyramid scheme.” That’s a safe DELETE.
  • Anyone who lists their occupation as “Street Evangelistic FOR THE LORD” is a safe unfriend, if for no other reason than I can just hear the guy screaming in my ear FOR THE LORD!!!” Yep, DELETE that guy.
  • Any Christian that says their first name in their Facebook profile is “Blessed” is 100 percent a safe DELETE. “Blessed” is code for “I live with 64 cats and love Nicholas Cage movies.”
  • Finally, half of the guys who list their Facebook names as “their first name + their wife’s first name” (ex: Bill and Jeanine Smith) are definitely men whose wives caught them watching porn.

These guys will not be allowed to hang out with you any time soon. DELETE.

Well, I hope these guidelines help!

You. Are. Welcome.


This article on who to unfriend originally appeared here.