Why did I get hurt by my church? Because I cared about it. If I were sitting on the fringes, I wouldn’t have cared what happened to it. I would’ve moved on.
The church relationship breaks down for the same reason any high-maintenance friendship or marriage breaks down. The love or friendship turns out to be conditional.
Married people love each other, until they have irreconcilable differences. Isn’t that a trite reason for divorce? It just means those two people had love for the other that was conditional. The relationship breaks down because one person didn’t meet the other person’s conditions for being loved.
Church breaks down because Christians decide their love for others is conditional. Or their love for their church is conditional.
So maybe you’re the person who didn’t meet Christians’ conditions for love. Maybe your church didn’t meet your conditions for love. It disappointed you, and you walked away. Either way, the result is the same.
In fact, I might say that given enough time, a person who is truly emotionally invested in the church won’t be able to not be disappointed or hurt by the people inside. Just like any other relationship, it’s inevitable.
Maybe making apologies for the church is quickly becoming a cliché. But it will never become obsolete as long as people continue to emotionally invest in it.
