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Pastoral Confession: Why I Don't Evangelize

There they sit, ever afflicted by the beatings, like the young man voyaging from Jerusalem to Jericho who fell upon robbers (Luke 10.30-34) and I am like the Levite or the preist who just walked on by. I have a medicine cabinet strapped to my back and I ignore them like they are not even there. Why? I do not love them. Perhaps you can relate?

One thing that has been particularly helpful relative to loving others with the Gospel is to look into people’s eyes.

No, I did not just go off the deep end. We live in a society where we fly by one another without even noticing each other, and when we look for more than the accepted 2.8 seconds, suddenly we are psychotic.

What I am advocating is to look at people. Watch them, pray for them, look into their eyes as they speak to you. Hear their heart cry for relief. When you are filled with divine love for the glory of God and fueled for a love for your neighbor, a good, healthy look into a person’s eyes will convict you to the quick to evangelize and cease from meaningless dialogue about such futile things as the weather, the news or other distractions.

In this vein I was struck by Alex Montoya’s words in his helpful book, Preaching with Passion. Montoya is a professor at The Master’s Seminary in Sun Valley, Calif.

Montoya writing in the context of losing compassion for people:

“That is when I retreat to a small taco stand in the barrio of East Los Angeles, to a place where real people live. I order a cup of coffee and sit with my back against the wall. Then I watch, I observe, I read and I listen intently for the heart cry.

A group of gang-bangers come in for a snack—one in four will die before the age of 18; two of the others will end up in prison. All are doomed to a hard life. A young mother comes in with her brood of youngsters. It is obvious they are poor. They share drinks. They live in poverty; some will never see a forest or snow. An old drunk staggers in, begging for a meal. He is quickly thrown out. That was somebody’s baby boy. A mother at one time cradled that man and nursed him. … I look, I listen until I hear their cries, until their souls cry out to me, ‘Please help, I’m perishing!’ until the tears pour forth from my melted heart! I am in love with humanity once again.”

Perhaps you can relate to my tension.

If you struggle like I do, I’d encourage you to pray to God that you might love him more, more along the lines with which he loves himself. And likewise that he would be kind to cause you to love others more, more along the lines with which he loves others. Pray God would let you hear folks’ hearts cry and would open your mouth to speak the words of eternal life, joy and grace.

We do know why we do not evangelize, and this fact should bring us back to the reason why we must.