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Pastors, Don’t Even TRY These 3 Things

3. Pastors must never use personal illustrations that put him in a glorious light. 

I’m not sure why this is true. But it is.

Let the preacher tell a story of someone or something challenging him and how he faced up to the matter and became a hero, and the audience sits there in silence, confused as to what to make of this.

However, let the preacher tell of the time he tried to fix the plumbing problem and made matters worse before calling in a professional, the time he filled in for the coach and his team lost by 28 runs, or the time he got up the courage to ask the prettiest girl in school for a date and embarrassed himself, and the audience is completely with him.

When the great Apostle Paul began giving his credentials for apostleship, he preceded the presentation by saying, “I speak as a fool” (he does this several times Second Corinthians chapter 11). He is embarrassed to be showing off his resume. In fact, in Philippians 3, after listing his accomplishments, he proceeds to trash the whole business. There is a lesson here.

Likewise, the pastor cannot brag about his family from the pulpit in this way without paying a price. Tell how his daughter won a beauty contest or the valedictorian’s slot or a scholarship, and some in the congregation will squirm. Tell how his wife has just received her Ph.D. or been named “teacher of the year” and it appears as bragging.

Not that these things cannot be said in church. But it’s best if someone else says them. Even better, if no one mentions them at all from the pulpit and people find out by word of mouth, the pastor’s family becomes heroes to the congregation.

Don’t ask me why this is; but it is.

Examples from the pastor’s own life are best when he has failed at something and learned a valuable lesson. Examples from his family are best when they show lessons learned the hard way, with humor if possible, and with the full support of the entire family. (No pastor should ever use a story of his wife and children without their complete agreement.)

My wife wants me to emphasize that we are not saying the pastor cannot mention his family from the pulpit. “You get the impression some pastors don’t even have a family,” she says. OK, point well taken.

God bless you, pastor. I’m through here.