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5 Ways to Take the Sting Out of Criticism

CriticismYou dread it. I dread it. Who doesn’t?

In fact, it can completely derail your day, your week and your work.

So what do you do when it comes your way?

Can You Find a Criticism-Free Environment?

More than a few of us have dreamed of working in a place where no one criticizes anyone.

And, as a result, more than a few leaders have left a place of employment or ministry to find greener pastures where there won’t be as much opposition, only to be disappointed that criticism just seems to come with the territory wherever you go.

Don’t get me wrong, there are some toxic workplaces and there are definitely some toxic people (here are six early warning signs you’re dealing with a toxic person). And there are healthy workplaces and healthy people.

But even in a healthy environment, criticism is inevitable.

So how do you deal with it?

Five Ways to Make Criticism Sting Less and Grow From It

Here are five ways I’ve found to make criticism sting less and, in the process, respond in a way that helps me grow as a leader.

1. Don’t Respond for 24 Hours. Just Don’t.

Every time you get a critical email, a critical comment, a critical text or phone call, something happens inside you, doesn’t it?

Your heart starts beating faster. You feel hurt, even crushed depending on what they said. And sometimes you get angry.

And usually when that happens, your emotions derail your brain. At least they derail mine.

I learned years ago almost nothing good happens when I’m upset.

In an attempt to address the situation, I almost always make it worse. Even if I convince myself I’ll make it better, I usually don’t. Not when I’m upset.

So years ago, I made a rule. When you feel an emotional reaction to criticism, don’t respond for 24 hours.

That’s easy in the case of an email, a text or written complaint. Just sleep on it.

But even when there’s a verbal exchange, just bite your tongue. Thank them. Say little or nothing. Don’t respond.

After 24 hours elapse, something amazing usually happens. You get your brain back.

A day later, you can respond reasonably and rationally to something that you once could only respond to emotionally.

You’ve slept on it. Hopefully you’ve prayed about it. And maybe you’ve even talked to a few wise friends about how to respond with grace and integrity.

You’ve lost nothing.

And you’ve gained so much.

So wait. Just wait.