I read a lot of articles and blog posts in 2014 addressing the current state of the local church pastor in America. Several were written in response to a couple of high-profile resignations and others were just offering commentary on some bizarre occurrences in pastoral life.
All of the pieces suggested a string of continuing problems within the pastorate that are resulting in moral failures and terminations of leadership. The issues most referenced were personal arrogance, the celebrity culture of American evangelicalism and the historical significance of hero worship.
This list is obviously not exhaustive nor is it new. Some nuance of all these factors have been plaguing ministers for ages. Today’s context has simply introduced new and creative ways to foster an insidious, over-sized ego, fall into sin and fuel an insatiable desire to be awesome.
When I say awesome, I mean being excessively honored; receiving global name recognition and having more followers on Twitter and Instagram than Justin Bieber. It’s being the talent envy of others while speaking at events attended by underprivileged, not so awesome pastors and writing transcendent books from the platform of a wildly successful ministry. That kind of awesome.
I admit it, the pursuit of awesomeness is seductive and presents quite the challenge in modern leadership. By human standards, it is much more stimulating to build a framework of magnificence than it is to be a servant. Settling for the role of a mere undershepherd is boring when the title of Captain Awesome is out there to attain. Yet, a servant and an undershepherd is exactly what God calls the pastor to be even in today’s progressive climate.
All of this has prompted a lot of personal and spiritual evaluation. The news of the last year has been sobering, convicting and led me to prayerfully reflect on why I don’t want to be awesome:
I’m Not Awesome
The definition of the word awesome is “to cause feelings of fear and wonder.” There is not one thing about me that personifies that meaning. Not my personality, skills, charisma, stature or bench press. Nor will there ever be.
I am simply a person whom God has gifted in a way that is tailored to my design. With his help in the application of my gifts, I can have an eternal impact in the world and be part of some pretty amazing things. Jesus said in John 14:12, “I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works, because I am going to be with the Father.”
The fact that Christ would choose to work in and through me to accomplish anything is what causes awe and wonder. I can’t generate that response on my own and I can’t produce those results apart from God’s Holy Spirit. He’s awesome and I just pray that I can be faithful to him.
