A Secret Your Husband Needs You to Know

Ladies, there’s a secret your husband probably won’t share.

He may not even like that I’m sharing it.

It’s not that he doesn’t want you to know. He does. But it’s hard to admit sometimes. Or difficult to find the right words.

But I feel you need to know. It could make a huge difference in your marriage.

Here goes:

He needs your unconditional respect—in fact, he needs you to be his biggest fan.

There. The secret is out in the open.

It’s true. He needs to know you respect him—what he does and who he is.

Your support feeds his God-given ego.

Of course, that ego can be abused. And it is many times. It doesn’t, however, diminish his need. I would even say—his greatest need.

Just as you need his unconditional love, he needs your unconditional respect. (And vice-versa.)

I also realize neither you nor he is capable of perfectly fulfilling those individual needs.

But at least you know the secret now.

Doing well for the woman he loves is perhaps one of the greatest goals in a man’s life.

That inner desire starts at a very early age. The little league ball player who turns around to see if mom watches him bat. The same little boy who brings a flower (weed) home to mom. It’s the respect he’s seeking.

The truth is, sometimes a guy feels as if he doesn’t measure up to everyone’s standards. Actually, it happens a lot of times.

(Please don’t tell him I told you all this.)

He feels the weight of being wonderful in so many areas. His home. His family. His work. Even in his hobby.

It’s a pressure men carry internally—possibly never sharing it with anyone.

Chances are, fear of failure is his greatest fear. And the fear of disappointing you is a close second.

He may see you seeming to do so well with all your responsibilities. Whether in the home, with the kids or in relationships—he feels you always know what you’re doing. He knows he doesn’t.

Even your walk with God may shine brighter than his sometimes. OK—most times.

You handle things so well; in fact, at times, he’s tempted to not even try.

1
2
Previous articleBrene Brown: Scarier Than Vulnerability
Next articleOne Tip for Powerful Preaching: Repetition
Ron Edmondson
Ron Edmondson is a pastor and church leader passionate about planting churches, helping established churches thrive, and assisting pastors and those in ministry think through leadership, strategy and life. Ron has over 20 years business experience, mostly as a self-employed business owner, and he's been helping churches grow vocationally for over 10 years.