• I connect them with people who have experienced similar issues.
• I may diagram the problem, as I hear it, so they can see the issue on paper.
• I help them learn to pray and listen to God.
And then I release them to make a decision.
Here is my reasoning …
If I solve the problem:
• I’m just another opinion—and I may be wrong.
• They’ll resent me if it proves to be a wrong decision.
• They may never take ownership of the issue.
• They’ll likely do what they want anyway.
• They won’t learn the valuable skills of listening to the voice of God.
• They won’t learn from experience.
• They will only need someone to give them the answer next time.
My advice:
Don’t always have an answer.
Help people form a paradigm through which to to solve their problems or make decisions.
Leaders, parents, friends—ideally you want people to develop healthy decision-making skills. You want them to gain independence and be able to stand on their own. If you’re always making the decisions for them, they will never become all they can be individually.
Are you too quick to have an answer sometimes?
