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Are You A Frustrated Fixer?

This weekend we celebrated Mother’s Day with a special message from Pastor Steven entitled, “Frustrations of a Fixer.” This message was challenging, uplifting and taught us how to release ourselves from some of the frustrations we encounter in life. If you missed it, read some of our favorite moments below or watch the entire message here.

In 1 Samuel 1:1-11, we read the story of Elkanah and Hannah. Elkanah, a wealthy man, had two wives, Peninnah and Hannah. Peninnah had children, but Hannah had none. Hannah was often taunted and tormented by her rival over this fact. Meanwhile, Elkanah showed great love for Hannah through everything he did. Yet, none of his efforts could relieve the pain that Hannah felt as a result of her inability to bear children. Pastor Steven likened this story to the frustrated expectations we face today as we try to fix situations that only God can fix. Here’s some of the things we learned through their story.

It’s not all about you. Often, as Pastor Steven said, we approach people “from the center of ourselves,” expecting that any troubles or frustrations are a direct result of something that we did wrong. This tension is the root of our frustrated expectations and ties the peace of God in our lives to our ability to fix other people. We need to say, “I will not allow anyone else’s frustration to define me as a failure.” When you bear the responsibility of fixing things, there’s nothing more frustrating than a lack of progress.

Don’t expect a relationship to fulfill a purpose that it was not designed to fulfill. At the heart of Elkanah’s frustration was his desire to use his love to compensate for the grief that plagued Hannah. Meanwhile, Hannah was still frustrated with her unhealed brokenness. Either way, any affirmation someone could give them would ultimately leak from their broken hearts. As Pastor Steven said, many of our disappointed or frustrated relationships are a direct result of us placing the responsibility of affirmation and healing on people that are just as broken as we are.

Give God His job back. Pastor Steven challenged us to release these people from the responsibility to play God in our lives. Once you relinquish yourself and others from being God, you can cooperate with what He wants to do in your life. We all have either tried to fix something that only God can fix and we’ve all found frustration in expecting others to fix something that was meant for God to fix. If you’ll just let God do His job, He will do it far better than you ever could!

What’s one relationship you need to release control of to God?

To watch the entire message from Pastor Steven click here. To learn more about building great relationships in the context of marriage watch The Mr. & Mrs. Betterhalf series.