1. Avoid mentioning what’s going to happen at your church this weekend. Yep, keep folks in the dark. OR feed them all sorts of useless or insider info. While this may appeal to the ADD in all of us (“Honey, I found this church Web site and, ooooh, a golf outing!”), it doesn’t say much about what to expect. But that WeatherBug thing is kinda neat.
2. Put a picture of your building on the main page. After all, ministry is all about the buildings.
3. Use lots of purple and pink and add pictures of flowers. Really. Are you expecting any men to show up? And, for my benefit, please don’t put any doves on your Web site. Doves scare me.
4. Make them click a skip intro or enter site link. See, in my world, “skip intro” translates into “skip site altogether.” Which leaders to “skip church service.” Probably not what you were going for.
5. Add as many pictures and graphics as you can to the main page. Man, I’m trying to sort out what’s important in my life—I don’t have time to figure out what’s important about your church. Don’t just throw it all at me at once, hoping something sticks. I can get that at the office.
6. Use bad photography. If you have the budget, hire a professional designer or photographer, or get stock photography (I can tell you where it’s affordable). If not, find someone in your church who’s truly gifted in this area and ask them to take a look at what you’ve got. They’ll probably offer to help just to subdue their own cringe response.
7. List every single ministry your church offers. Because, really, I don’t have enough stuff crowding my life yet. Or enough “opportunities” overwhelming me. Seriously? I just want to know whether or not I should visit your church this weekend. And whether I can do it without being sucked into something I’m not ready for.
8. Make them dig for driving directions, service times, or information about where the kids go while the parents are in “big people” church. I don’t know about you, but I’m a guy; I don’t get “lost.” Ergo, I don’t stop for directions. As for my kids, any parent knows, if the kids aren’t happy … well, the kids aren’t happy.
9. Put a picture of your pastor with his wife on the main page. Am I the only one who finds this a little creepy? Your church isn’t really just about a personality, right? I mean, who are you suggesting I follow—your pastor or Christ?
10. Focus on “selling” your church. Did you not get the memo? It’s all about me. Really. And you cannot sell your church until you’ve sold me on how I will personally benefit from being there. Curb the tendency to brag and boast—or to baffle me with, well, you know.
