Home Small Group Leaders Articles for Small Group Leaders 7 Ways Extroverts Can Better Engage Introverts

7 Ways Extroverts Can Better Engage Introverts

Don’t assume we are unfriendly or anti-social

We may not be talking, but that doesn’t mean we do not love people or that we don’t want to communicate with them. The opposite is probably more true. We just prefer to do it in less extroverted ways. Plus, we talk one at a time, so if there’s someone always talking, we may not get a chance—or take the opportunity.

Give us time to form the relationship

Introverts don’t usually form relationships quickly. We may appear harder to get to know, but when we do connect, we are loyal friends with deep, intimate connections. And we can actually be quite fun—even silly at times—once you get to know us.

Allow us time alone

All of us need personal time, but we require even more time alone than an extrovert usually does. We energize during these times—not just relax—and there’s a huge difference.

Don’t expect us to always love or get excited about extroverted activities

The social activities where you get to meet all the cool people you do not know—yeah—that’s not always our idea of fun. It may even be a little scary. It might make us nervous at the thought of it. We’ll find excuses not to go, even if we know we need the experience or will have fun once we do them. (Cheryl helps me so much with this one. She stays by my side until I acclimate to the room. And, that’s usually what it takes for the introvert to really enjoy these type settings.)

Allow us to use written communication when available

We often prefer email or text over phone calls. We are usually more engaging when we can write out our thoughts ahead of time.


This article originally appeared here.

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Ron Edmondson is a pastor and church leader passionate about planting churches, helping established churches thrive, and assisting pastors and those in ministry think through leadership, strategy and life. Ron has over 20 years business experience, mostly as a self-employed business owner, and he's been helping churches grow vocationally for over 10 years.