“They [young adults] really hate the hypocrisy—and it’s there. Sexual issues are a big part of it. Nothing irritates a millennial more than seeing homosexuality singled out as the big sin, while Christians have premarital sex, get divorces, watch porn and cheat on their spouses. It’s not that Christians necessarily do these things more than unbelievers (that’s an unfounded claim), but they do them—and, as Jesus said, if nothing else, they lust in their hearts, so some humility (not to mention perspective) is called for. When millennials start hearing Christians condemn homosexuals without admitting their own failings, they stop listening.”[6]
Although, I do not agree with the article in its entirety, McAllister is exactly right in her response to the hypocrisy found in churches. Churches are not to be perfect, but it is true that many churches elevate certain sins such as homosexuality over other sins, and young adults call this hypocrisy. Matthew 5 records the conversation between Jesus and the Pharisees. Jesus tells the Pharisees that they are as bad as the adulterers because they have already committed adultery in their hearts. Now, obviously the sin has different results, but to God, the sin of thinking about adultery is the same as going out and committing adultery. To a millennial, someone who fantasizes in their mind about sex is as guilty as someone who is a public homosexual. Millennials hate hypocrisy, and the church must limit their hypocrisy if they intend to keep millennials in church.
Their Faith Is Shallow
David Kinnaman, president of the Barna group, published a book on this subject titled You Lost Me. In his book, Kinnaman suggests that the shallowness of the millennials’ faith has two sides. First, you have the young adults who have a superficial understanding of the faith and of the Bible. Kinnaman states that this group has faith that is an inch deep. Second, we find faith communities that convey a lot of information about God rather than discipling young believers to live wholly and deeply in the reality of God. “When you put these two together, the result is a generation of young adults whose faith is an inch deep and a mile wide—too shallow to survive and too broad to make a difference.”[7] Kinnaman and the Barna Group conducted a survey of over 1,200 young adults in 2011. Here are the results of their survey:
| Completely True of Me Mostly True of Me |
| Church is boring 16% 31% Faith is not relevant to my career or my interests 13% 24% My church does not prepare me for real life 9% 23% My church does not help me find my purpose 9% 23% The Bible is not taught clearly or often enough 7% 23% God seems missing from my experience of church 7% 20% |
These statistics may not seem like large percentages, but they do represent millions of young adults.[8]
Life Changes
Probably the most universal and frequent reason young adults are leaving the church is life changes. Twenty-seven percent of young adults said that they left the church because they simply wanted a break from church. Twenty-two percent said that they moved away from the church and could not find a new church within driving distance that they wanted to attend. Twenty-five percent claimed that the reason they left was that they went off to college. Twenty-three percent said that work took them out of church.[9] All of these statistics show the different life stages of being a young adult. College, work, moving away and the ability to make their own schedules are all stages that young adults go through. It is more difficult to balance these life stages along with spiritual growth when you have more freedom as a young adult.
Religious, Ethical or Political Reasons
Eighteen percent said that they left the church because they disagreed with the church’s political or social issues, and that they were attending church to please others (17 percent). Fifty-two percent of the young adults polled identified a religious, ethical or political reason as a contribution to the reason that they left the church.[10] This is likely the most obvious of the reasons people leave the church as a whole.
All of the reasons mentioned are reasons for a young adult to consider leaving the church. It is important to note that 80 percent of the young adults who were polled had no real intention of leaving the church to begin with. This implies that the reasons they gave for leaving are legitimate concerns that the church is faced with in regards to keeping the young adults in church. In fact, I would venture that the statistics given in Lifeway’s research disprove Ken Ham and Britt Beemer’s belief that the majority of the young adults who leave church were already gone long before they graduated high school. Ken Ham along with Britt Beemer published the popular book Already Gone. In their book, they seek to prove that the majority of young adults left the church mentally and spiritually early in their teenage years.[11] Now, I do agree with some of their sentiments in the book; I do not believe that it is true in its entirety. Lifeway’s research suggests otherwise. The majority of the young adults polled said that they had no intention of leaving until they were faced with the different life stages that came after high school graduation.
[1] Lifeway.com.
[2] Thom Rainer and Sam Rainer, Essential Church: Reclaiming a Generation of Dropouts (Nashville, TN: B&H Publishing Group, 2008), 104.
[3] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton: Standard Bible Society, 2001), Mt 23:28.
[4] Martin H. Manser, Dictionary of Bible Themes: The Accessible and Comprehensive Tool for Topical Studies (London: Martin Manser, 2009).
[5] Rachel Evans, “Why Millennials are Leaving the Church.” Religion.blogs.cnn.com, http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2013/07/27/why-millennials-are-leaving-the-church/ (Accessed June 12, 2015).
[6] D.C. McAllister, “How not to Communicate with Millennials.” Thefederalist.com, http://thefederalist.com/2015/04/10/how-not-to-communicate-with-millennials-like-hozier/ (Accessed June 12, 2015).
[7] David Kinnaman, You Lost Me: Why Young Christians are Leaving Church…And Rethinking Faith (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Publishing, 2011), 114-115.
[8] Ibid, 116.
[9] Lifeway.com.
[10] Ibid.
[11] Ken Ham and Britt Beemer, Already Gone: Why your Kids will quit church and what you can do to stop it (Green Forest, AR: Master Books, 2009), 33-34.
