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Teaching Junior Highers About Sex

This weekend, we wrap up our series called, “The Guy/Girl Thing”. It’s a series dedicated to helping junior highers begin to navigate relationships with the opposite sex. Here is what we’ve covered so far:

Week 1:  Developing Healthy Friendships With Each Other.  We simply took a look at some of the differences between guys and girls, and how an understanding of some of these differences can help us be better friends with each other.

Week 2:  Dating:  We took a look at what begins to happen when a friendship becomes more than just a friendship. We addressed such questions as:  When is it okay to start dating? Who should I date?  How should I date?  What role do should my parents play in all of this?

Week 3:  This weekend, we will wrap the series up by talking about sex. I feel a little overwhelmed because ONE lesson on sex isn’t enough.  I am afraid I will try to cram too much into the lesson, thus making it too complex, and more confusing than helpful.  But, here is where we are headed:


1) Sex is GOOD….In Fact, It Was GOD’S Idea!  (And God’s word is his rule book on the subject)

2) The World Has TWISTED God’s Plan.  (According to the world, there really is no rule book on the subject)

3) This leaves us with a CHOICE…Do We Trust God’s Way or The World’s Way?

Obviously, the bulk of the lesson lies with what is discussed along the way, but that is the general outline of where we’re headed. The looming question for me is if, and if so to what extent, I talk about pornography, same sex attraction, how far is too far, masturbation, lust, etc. It seems borderline irresponsible to leave that stuff out, but to include it all seems like I will overwhelm them.  We will see how it shakes out!

NOTE:  As we wrap up the series, we will selling two little books…one for girls, and one for guys.  I’ve created quite a few resources over the years, but 99 Thoughts About Guys…For Girls Eyes Only” and “99 Thoughts About Girls…For Guys Eyes Only” are two of my all time favorite!  I think they are a must-read for every junior higher.

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Kurt Johnston has been involved in junior high ministry since 1988 and is currently the junior high pastor at Saddleback Church in Southern California. He's the author of Controlled Chaos: Making Sense of Junior High Ministry and Go Team! He loves providing resources for junior high ministry almost as much as he loves junior highers themselves.