“I got to the point were I said ‘You know what? I can no longer in good conscience amen what I’ve amened. Preach what I’ve preached. Believe what I’ve believed,’” Goodwin said.
Goodwin had reached a point where he wasn’t even comfortable taking a more liberal position within the Christian faith, because he felt that would be dishonest.
“I think I understand when I hold the Bible in my hands, I think I understand what I’m holding now. I think I understand it now better than I ever have—and I don’t believe it—but I understand it,” Goodwin said. “I actually still love the gospel. I actually still love the way that the message has been massaged and presented to us. The way the Scriptures present themselves. The various authors. I get it. I just don’t believe it.”
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Goodwin shared that he has been writing to pastors, scholars, and theologians, challenging them to say what they really believe and stop dancing around the issues that he and others have gone through in doubting the Bible.
“I’m not going to allow you to lie and mislead me,” he said. “I’m going to put these thoughts out there for anybody else who thinks there’s more to this, and I want to hear a more honest take. I don’t think that many [pastors, scholars, and theologians] have the courage to say what their theology really means when you hit the equal sign. If you say this, and you say this, and you say this [and] you hit the equal sign, to me it doesn’t equal and I still believe.”
“I love you. I love the legacy that I was a part of. I love the church. I think there’s some hard but honest discussion that we need to have,” Goodwin concluded. “I’ve always only ever been a seeker of truth and a relayer of what I believe to be true…the best way I know how to love is in truth—speak the truth in love.”
After the video stopped, a message appeared that read, “I’m sorry to all those hurt and devastated by this news. I did not make this decision hastily nor do I take it lightly. Remember, my faith is not your faith. And my loss of faith need not be yours. I have not given any specifics in this video as to protect those who do not wish to be further troubled by the details. More in time. Yours, however you’ll have me.”
