7. A church must be honest about what it can and can’t do. Too many churches assume help found outside the church body is, by definition, “worldly” or all problems must be handled totally in-house. This is foolishness.
A wise church will make use of legal authorities if necessary, qualified and trained biblical counseling services, consultants, etc.
8. The discipleship culture of a church needs transparency and the welcome of grace. It must be a safe place to not be OK. This must be initiated and modeled by those in leadership.
If a leader is insular and secretive and un-confessional, if he is not a gracious person or a listening person in the church, he sets a standard for a climate of distrust, secrecy and fear.
9. A church should make humility a top requirement for leaders. Humility is observable. Look for it. And if it is hard to see in a leader, they should probably not be a leader.
Everyone struggles with pride, of course, but leaders with surfacing problems of arrogance or aggression or self-centeredness will always struggle in discerning areas of power and vulnerability, which are very important to sort out in preventing abuse or handling its occurrences. You can’t trust an un-humble person to sort through the fallout of abuse occurring under his watch.
10. The preacher should preach against abuse. I’m not saying it ought to be the theme of his ministry, of course, but every Sunday families come into the church service harboring secret sins involving exploitation of the weak and defenseless.
Preachers need to bring the fear of God to abusers who may never otherwise be confronted with it. Victims need to know their preacher knows what’s happening to them is serious sin, even if he doesn’t know it’s happening to them. The subject needs to be put out on the table, and people need to know where God, and thus the church, stands on abuse.
There is lots more to be said and studied, but those are some hard thoughts for the moment.
