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4 Reasons Men Like Porn

The Biblical Goal of Accountability Questions

The reason accountability partners should ask these pointed questions is not to “psychologize” sins away. Rather, the goal of good accountability questions is to use them as a springboard to focus our thoughts on benefits of the Gospel of Christ more than the pleasures of sin (Hebrews 11.24-26″ data-version=”niv”>Heb. 11:24-26).

Each question opens a door to living out Hebrews 10.24″ data-version=”niv”>Heb. 10:24: “Let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works.”

When we ask the question, “Has there been a relationship in your life recently that has been unusually difficult?” the goal is to help others see how they are looking to a particular relationship to make them feel pleasure or fulfillment (thus, a relationship that is always letting them down). We can then point them to the fullness of joy and satisfaction that comes from Christ (John 15:1-11; John 16.16-24″ data-version=”niv”>16:16-24; Romans 15.13″ data-version=”niv”>Rom. 15:13).

When we ask the question, “Have there been any stresses in your life recently that have brought on a feeling of pressure or strain?” the goal is to help them see that they are using porn as an escape from life. We can then point them to the psalmists who saw God as their refuge (Psalms 46; 59:16-17; 61:1-3; 62:5-8; 91; 142). Instead of escaping from reality, we can escape into divine reality.

When we ask the questions, “Have you found yourself bored or itching for excitement? Do you feel like your life is mundane?” the goal is to help others see if they have been settling for a life of amusement over a life of amazement. We can then point them to the excitement of knowing God and obeying him (Matt. 13:44).

When we ask the question, “Have you been in any situations recently that made you feel belittled, unimportant, or disrespected?” the goal is to help them see they crave power, importance and esteem from men more than they crave the favor of God. Jesus asked, “How can you believe, when you receive glory from one another and do not seek the glory that comes from the only God?” (John 5:44; Romans 2.6-10″ data-version=”niv”>Rom. 2:6-10; Colossians 1.24-29″ data-version=”niv”>Col. 1:24-29). 

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lukegilkerson@churchleaders.com'
Luke Gilkerson is the general editor and primary author of the Covenant Eyes blog. Luke has a BA in Philosophy and Religious Studies from Bowling Green State University and is working on an MA in Religion from Reformed Theological Seminary. Before working at Covenant Eyes he spent six years as a campus minister. Luke and his wife Trisha live with their four sons in Owosso, Michigan, and they blog at IntoxicatedOnLife.com.