So, unforgiveness not only keeps us chained to our offender but it profoundly affects our bodies and brains.
How to Overcome Unforgiveness
1. Admit the pain.
When we name a painful emotion (not stuffing or rehearsing it), we actually decrease that negative emotion’s intensity.
Processing our pain through writing it down can lessen the pain and help us gain better perspective. However, don’t let journaling become another way to rehearse and reinforce your pain. Through journaling seek to gain God’s perspective and healing.
3. Begin to choose to forgive the person.
Notice that I used the word ‘begin.’ Some offenses can be quickly forgiven. Some may take a long time to fully forgive. Forgiveness is a process. The deeper the pain, the longer it takes. It’s not so much forgive and forget. Rather, true forgiveness is more like remembering it less and less.
4. Draw deeply from God’s grace.
At the root of the Christian faith lies grace, receiving God’s grace and extending it to others who have hurt us.
The Apostle Paul reminded us in Colossians 3.13 to forgive others as Jesus has forgiven us.
Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
What insights have you learned about forgiving others?