3. Exclusionary Attitude: You refuse to partner with other local churches on community initiatives.
The town square is being revitalized. Several churches in town are working together for the betterment of the community … except one. Because the pastor at First Church doesn’t want to be seen as being soft on beliefs by working alongside a pastor who thinks differently, baptizes in another way or believes something different about a non-gospel issue.
As I’ve written, there are certain instances when partnering across denominational lines would be ill-advised. Community initiatives with fellow Christians are not those times. One of the most telling things about your church, and you as a pastor, is your reputation in the community. That leads us to …
4. Narcissistic: You are more worried about what people think of your church than what they think of your family.
When this pastor attends school functions for the kids, they are more known as the pastor of First Church than as “Ella’s parent” or “Jamie’s spouse.” Why is this? Because they introduce themselves as “Pastor of First Church” instead of just by their name.
Be known as a good parent first. If you are known as a good parent to your kids and as someone who loves their spouse, the pastor thing will take care of itself.