My kids don’t give a rip about what I achieve, how talented I am or what anyone thinks about me. I can see it in their eyes—I would be their hero if I sang songs with a chromatic scale and strummed a guitar with my elbow.
But so often we choose the crowd over the home. The crowds compliment you. Your worship team follows you. Your Twitter followers retweet you.
Your wife wants you to change the fifth diarrhea diaper of the day. Your kids want more milk and crackers and chocolate and popcorn and bananas and don’t want to take a nap. And they run into your room at 4 a.m.
This can cause someone in public ministry to drift toward the crowds and neglect their home. But that’s where your ministry loses its credibility.
The Problem With the Crowd Is Me
There is no relational depth in the crowd. They don’t know you for real. They don’t have history with you for real. Of course, it’s not their fault. It’s mine. It’s my own craving for approval. It’s my insecurity. It’s my searching for meaning in places it was never meant to be found.
Sure, your leadership is needed on stage, but it is twice as important at home. Many of us put loads of time into strategizing with our worship team—how to disciple people, how to recruit, how to develop new leaders and what activities to do.
Matter of fact, it’s what my book Beyond Sunday is all about.
But most of the time, we have zero plans for how we’ll lead our family in worship. Public success that isn’t supported by private leadership at home isn’t success … it’s neglect.
How can I spend time crafting keyboard tones, guitar swells, events and song lists for corporate worship, but not think twice about the worship culture of my home?
My suggestion? What I’m challenged to do? Be immersed in the home. Find joy in being present with the people you love—the people who need you—rather than looking for a pat on the back.
Sure, I would love to lead worship at Wembley arena, Madison Square Garden or at a Hillsong Conference. But those opportunities don’t equal success. When our life is through, we can know we’ve made a difference leading worship where it matters most—the best venue on earth.
But I’d love to hear from you on this. How do you balance the call to reach others with the call to lead your family? How do you balance changing the world with reaching your home?
