October marks five years that Justin has been a pastor. They’ve been five wonderful years, but, like every pastor will tell you, they’ve also been replete with ups and downs, joys and sorrows, encouragements and discouragements.
But more than anything, and through everything, God has been faithful. When benchmarks arrive, it can be enjoyable to reflect on what’s been learned during the season gone by. There is so much more I could write, but here are five simple reflections after five years:
1. Ministry can be distracting, but being distracted is a choice.
I know that, in part, church life these past five years has been distracting because I’ve gone through them with babies. When you have a baby in your arms and toddlers beside you on the pew, there’s always something that needs attention, whether it’s getting the raisins-you-didn’t-know-he-had out of the 2-year-old’s nose, or trying to pacify a newborn, or reminding the 4-year-old not to make paper airplanes out of the bulletin.
But it’s not just the distractions from my own family. As a pastor’s wife, there are many elements of church life that I’m constantly (and often needlessly) aware of that can beckon for my attention on Sunday mornings. Perhaps I’m noticing if something didn’t go smoothly with a transition in the service, or if the mics are too loud, or who’s present and absent that day, or wondering if the first-time visitors are being welcomed. The list of both inconsequential and legitimate distractions could go on and on.
But here’s what I’ve found: My heart needs corporate worship on Sunday and I need to focus on Christ, not on all those other things. They may beckon for my attention. But I make a choice: I can either choose to focus on Jesus, or I can choose to focus on everything else.
2. All those things older pastors and their wives told us really are true.
You know all those things that older pastors say? Things like, Don’t evaluate ministry, for good or bad, on a Sunday night. Or, Pastors’ wives, don’t give your husbands negative feedback about their sermon on the ride home from church … wait till the next day. Or, You’ll never please everyone in your church so don’t even try. Or, Being in ministry holds the greatest delights and also deepest sorrows you’ll ever know. The list could go on and on. As it turns out, they were right. It seems like all those older pastors and their wives just might have known what they were talking about.
3. The greatest way I can encourage my husband is to pursue Christ.
This one is both simple and deep at the same time. In our five years in ministry, there is nothing that encourages Justin more than when his wife is ministered to through his preaching and shepherding and is stirred to love Christ through his leadership. And more than that, when this stirring leads to Gospel-centered living.
4. A good pastor is a great blessing.
Maybe this one seems obvious, but for me, one of the joys of ministry has been to see God grow and use Justin. A wife is given a unique and up-close view of her husband’s strengths and weaknesses. As I reflect, all I can do is give thanks for a man who is who he is—the Justin that our church sees on Sundays is the exact same man that the children and I see every night behind closed doors. And that man is a good man, a faithful man. He is a strong yet gentle shepherd, and I am so thankful to belong to his fold.
5. God provides.
It’s who God is. He can’t not provide. And yet sometimes we doubt, don’t we? In these five years we’ve seen God provide for our family and for our church in some amazing and often unexpected ways. God has been good. God has been faithful. God has provided.
I was curious what Justin would say if he reflected upon the same theme, so I ambushed him during lunch one day and asked him what things come to mind when he thinks about the first five years.
Perhaps it’s worth mentioning that these were things that came to his mind in the moment, and it’s likely that with more time to reflect or develop these ideas, perhaps his answers might be slightly different. But I love his reflections just as they are: fresh, spontaneous, and as honest as it gets.
