Neither does he share his personal or sexual struggles with other ministers for fear he might lose his job.
5. Ministers frequently feed off the approval of others.
Ministers can be approval addicts. Their identities can revolve around the attention and comments of others.
A minister’s wellbeing, if it is unhealthy, rises and falls with every “Good sermon” or “Sister Jones is mad at you.” Not only are broken church members looking for attention, but so are broken ministers.
Sexual tension in a minister/parishioner relationship is powerful and deadly. It pushes the button of an approval addict and the needy church member, and can quickly lead to disaster.
START THE CONVERSATION, HAVE COURAGE.
Unfortunately, we must initiate these conversations about the need to flee from sexual immorality with our staff and church leaders. It’s doubtful a lay leader or denominational leader will get the ball rolling until there is a moral failure.
It takes courage to talk about potential holes in our ministry. It takes a higher motivation for integrity and sexual purity to draw boundaries, write policies and set up accountability.
These are points of vulnerability. They have been fault lines for many ministers before us who have fallen sexually. We ministers have a high responsibility and are accountable for the souls of many.
We mustn’t be lax in dealing with areas of sexual vulnerability or questioning our staff about them.
