I Broke the Rules
I asked overly self-conscious Orange County men and women to stand in the middle of a church service if they had never heard the words “I love you” or “I am proud of you” from their father.
A good ten seconds passed before one brave man stood. Then several more women and men joined him.
The keyboard player began to play some comforting chords, which infused this moment of freedom and healing with a gentle, safe spirit. Like a breaker rolling onto the Laguna Beach shoreline, it came from the back to the front. A wave of people began to rise up out of their seats. Some were weeping, some were holding their spouse’s hand, and others stood alone. The pure shock and awe of people letting their defenses down and making themselves vulnerable—in public—was powerful.
A Moment That Changed Everything
This burning bush moment began 40 minutes earlier with a few well-placed matches that I knew would kindle a fire in the hearts of many.
I said:
“I think all of us can agree that, for better or for worse, fathers leave an emotional fingerprint in our lives. I think that we can also agree that the love of a father can be transforming.
And guess what? We don’t grow out of our desire to be daddy’s ‘Big Man’ or ‘Little Princess.’ You and I are created to be the special object of a father’s love.”
I then blew gently on that ember with steady spiritual truth until it became, spiritually and emotionally speaking, a signature Southern California wildfire.
By the end, hundreds of grown men and women were consumed by God’s desire for them. They stood to renew or receive the blessing of their Father’s love—to end the quest for validation in unhealthy ways and to finally experience healing from that deep fear of not being personally affirmed.
What God Modeled for His Son
“As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him.
And a voice from heaven said, ‘This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.’”
— Matthew 3:16–17 (NIV)
Four Things Every Man, Woman, and Child Wants for Christmas
1. A Special Moment From a Father
“At that moment, heaven was opened…” Think spotlight. Every man, woman, and child deeply craves a father’s special love. God modeled this pattern for all of us.
2. A Special Name From a Father
Men, women, and children all want to be identified as a loved son or daughter first. Without that, we begin searching for identity through groups, titles, or lifestyles. What we crave most is to be called “my son” or “my daughter.”
3. A Special Love From a Father
Scripture says:
“There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear.”
— 1 John 4:18 (MSG)
God’s love liberates us from insecurity. When we accept that love, we find emotional stability and maturity that fear could never offer.
4. A Special Blessing From a Father
Affirmation matters. God didn’t just love Jesus—He said, “With him I am well pleased.” Every person needs that kind of encouragement: thoughtful affirmation that says, I see you, and I’m proud of who you’re becoming.
God’s Gift of a Father’s Love
What God modeled with His Son, He wants to give to all His spiritual sons and daughters. He knows we need His securing love and the assurance that all will be well in the end.
The good news of Christmas is that it’s never too late to receive your Father’s blessing.
How to Open the Gift
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See God’s heart for you as a Father (Jeremiah 3:19).
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Accept His blessing and respond to Him (Romans 8:15–16).
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Define yourself by His acceptance alone (Romans 8:37).
A Prayer for the Father’s Love
Heavenly Father,
In this moment, I recognize that You want to be a loving Father to me. Forgive me for seeking approval elsewhere and not seeing Your heart for me.
Through Jesus, I become Your child and live securely as Your own. I receive Your name, Your love, and Your blessing now and forever.
Thank You for redeeming my identity and calling me Yours.
Amen.
