Fortnite: Your Son’s Latest Obsession

Fortnite: Your Son's Latest Obsession

A day doesn’t go by where I don’t hear something about Fortnite.

It’s the game the majority of boys (of all ages) seem to be talking about these days. It was something completely different a year ago, and chances are good it will be something completely different a year from now. But for today, it’s Fortnite. Though it’s rated “T” for Teen, many parents of younger boys are allowing boys to explore it.

Many parents have compromised because of its cartoonish nature, or the lack of profanity or blood. There are sites and commentaries arguing the advantages of strategic thinking, teamwork and creativity.

Equally so, there are sites and commentaries arguing it’s still violent and how the online nature still exposes younger players to the offensive language of other players.

Spend more time in reality than in virtual activity

Wherever you land in your decision on Fortnite…or Minecraft…or Call of Duty…or whatever game takes the boy world by storm next, let me encourage you to make sure your son spends more time in reality than in virtual activity.

Make sure he spends more time kicking a real soccer ball than playing FIFA 2018.

Make sure he spends more time having real conversations that don’t involve wearing a headset, and do involve reading nonverbal communication and making eye contact.

Make sure he spends more time talking with real people than texting.

Make certain he has a context like scouting or playing sports, being a part of robotics team or a climbing club, a book club or youth group, student government or volunteering…places where he experiences real teamwork, human interaction, strategic thinking, creativity and practicing empathy.

Absolutely let him have time to enjoy video games (with limitations) as a means of practicing regulation.

I talked with a single mom recently that told her 14-year-old son she has three rules for gaming.

3 Rules for Child When Gaming:

  1. You gain five extra minutes the following day for turning it off without arguing. You lose 15 minutes the next day for battling me when it’s time to shut it down.
  2. I can’t control what you hear when you have the headset on. But if I hear you repeat something profane or disrespectful, the headset is put up for a week.
  3. Every time you turn the system off, you owe me 20 minutes of physical activity, to counter the effects of sitting still and being plugged in.

This mom is choosing to let his engagement with gaming serve as a vehicle for strengthening his ability to regulate himself. Technology Tuesday is all about helping parents feel more prepared, less behind and considering ways technology can work for you.

This article originally appeared here.

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DAVID THOMAS, LMSW is the Director of Family Counseling at Daystar Counseling in Nashville, TN, the co-author of eight books, including the best-selling Wild Things: The Art of Nurturing Boys, a frequent guest on national television and podcasts, has been featured in publications like USA Today, and speaks across the country. His newest book is Are My Kids on Track? The 12 Emotional, Social & Spiritual Milestones Your Child Needs to Reach. David recently released a podcast with Sissy and Melissa, based on the same book. He and his wife, Connie, have a daughter, twin sons and a feisty yellow lab named Owen. You can follow him on social media at raisingboysandgirls and catch the latest Technology Tuesday’s and parenting resources on his blog at