Silence, with your arm around the depressed, is the best advice. There may be a time for verbal inquiry, but this needs to come naturally and without judgement. You’re not given a podium to preach to the depressed; you’re given arms to hold them. Even if this doesn’t “work,” your goal should not be to bring them out of their depression. Your goal should be to be there for them their entire life if necessary. It is a terrible burden to bear when this is a loved one, I know. But this is how we bear the burdens of the depressed.
“Silences make the real conversations between friends. Not the saying but the never needing to say is what counts.” —Margaret Runbeck
When someone is there for you without all the answers and requiring you to follow their advice “or else,” you have a true friend. And, unfortunately, these friends have been rare from the beginning of time.
