Moral failing is a frightening term. It succinctly describes a disqualifying behavior in a church leader’s life. Often moral failure signifies some type of sexual sin. The leader has failed to live up to expected morals and integrity. He or she has lost the moral authority and credibility to lead.
An important note: Abuse differs from an affair. This distinction is important because an affair is consensual, while abuse is not. Abuse doesn’t belong in the moral failure category. It comes from a much darker place in someone’s heart and is much more damaging.
Moral failing is a phrase that makes my stomach churn. So many moral failures occur, some in the lives of partners my team works alongside. The phrase reminds me of the devastation left in the wake, impacting families and ministries.
I’ve learned that common warning signs appear in the lives of people who fall. Sometimes these warning signs of moral failing are more apparent afterward. People gather and say to one another, “Looking back, we see what was going on.”
Sure, it’s possible to hide these warning signs. But sin makes us incredibly stupid. So people caught up in the cycle of sin often don’t see the signals their foolishness is sending.
5 Warning Signs of Moral Failing
Ministry leaders: Please heed these warning signs of moral failure before it’s too late.
1. Considerable amounts of time away from home
If a husband or wife is comfortable being away from their spouse continually and for long periods of time, something is wrong. Some professions require frequent or lengthy absences (such as military deployments). But there’s a difference between longing to be with your spouse while away and being very comfortable with extensive periods apart.
2. A sudden obsession with physical fitness
We should steward our physical health well. After all, the Lord gave us our body, and we have only one. But when adults are suddenly obsessed with how they look, something else is likely going on. The provocative post-workout selfie pic on Facebook isn’t only weird. It could be saying something else.
3. Rarely talking about one’s spouse
Recently, after I received word that another church leader fell, I went to his social media accounts and perused his posts. I wasn’t sure what I was looking for, but I prayed for him as I scrolled.
One thing became apparent. I saw zero posts of him and his wife together. And lots of posts of him with arms around other women. What stood out wasn’t the pictures of him with friends (men or women) but the absence of his wife. Other than his bio, you wouldn’t have known he was married.