There are simply some things not to say to your pastor. The list is meant to be both humorous (and serious). And I bet almost every pastor has heard all of these in the course of a ministry.
Enjoy the list. Try to imagine these things spoken in real life, and you’ll understand why they are things not to say to your pastor.
1. I wish I had a job like yours, where I would work only one day a week.
2. What do you do with all the free time you have?
3. Can I have a couple of minutes before you preach?
4. I love you pastor, but _______________________________ (fill in the blank).
5. I like your preaching, pastor, but I really like ____________________________ (fill in the blank with television or podcast preacher).
6. Can your wife play piano?
7. Your kids shouldn’t behave that way. After all, they are pastor’s kids.
8. Your low salary is good for you. It keeps you humble and dependent on the Lord.
9. I bet you don’t spend any time preparing your sermons.
10. Pastor ________________ (predecessor pastor) didn’t do it that way.
11. You don’t have a real degree. You went to seminary.
12. How much longer do you think you’ll be at our church?
13. Did I wake you up pastor? It’s only 1:00 am.
14. Did you hear what they are saying about you?
Do you have any statements or questions to add to this list? Pastors: aren’t you glad you’ve let most questions go without an answer?
How many of you have heard these statements before?