It has seemingly become an everyday occurrence to open your favorite Christian news outlet and learn of yet another pastor or ministry leader who has been involved in a sexual indiscretion. For some, it occurred last week. For others, it was 35 years ago.
If you are like me, it can make your head spin with more questions than there seems to be answers to. These sorts of situations drive us, hopefully, back to God’s Word to get direction and insight into such problematic matters.
And yet, when we open the Old Testament, we learn that a man who committed adultery, had the woman’s husband killed, and covered it up was referred to as a man after God’s own heart. And not only that, but he was also considered a righteous King of Israel while having multiple wives. His name? King David.
How do we wrestle with the tension and answer the question, “If King David is a man after God’s own heart, why so many wives?”
I want to first go back to the beginning of David’s life. The genesis of his conception.
David says in Psalm 51:5: “Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me.”
David made this statement upon reflecting of his affair/adultery with Bathsheba. I think he was potentially tying his actions to how he himself came into existence in his own life.
The Bible does not mention King David’s mother by name. A Jewish legend has named her Nitzevet, but there is no biblical confirmation of that name. David’s father lived in Bethlehem and was from the tribe of Judah. David was the youngest of eight brothers. He also had at least two sisters, Zeruiah and Abigail. The only thing we know from the Bible about David’s mom is what he said about her in Psalm 86:16: He referred to her as a woman who served God as he did.
Some scholars believe David’s sisters, Abigail and Zeruiah, may have been his half-sisters and that their father was not Jesse but Nahash.
Nahash was an Ammonite king. Speculation suggests that David’s mother had been married to Nahash when she bore the half-sisters and then later became the second wife or mistress of Jesse. Further speculation implies that David’s mother was not yet married to Jesse when she became pregnant—that perhaps she was still married to Nahash when she conceived David.
This theory could explain why David was not accepted by his family. The theory might also shed some light on Psalm 51:5: “Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me.”
Let’s assume the extrabiblical info tells us that David sadly repeated the sin of his mom. He had an affair with Bathsheba. Now we are not yet answering the question, “Is polygamy okay for a follower of Jesus who is termed a person after God’s own heart?” But here is what we do know from Psalm 51:5 and the extrabiblical literature. Adultery is a sin in God’s eyes, David’s eyes, and it would seem David’s mom’s eyes.
