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25 Really Strange Things Church Members Say to Pastors

  1. “I have the spiritual gift of extortion.”
    via GIPHY
    Another Southern Baptist.
  2. “Preacher, I have some moonshine for your cough. Feel free to stop by the house.”

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    That’s one pastoral visit he made that week.
  3. “Will you play George Jones songs in the service today?”
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    I’m sorry, we’re doing all Bee Gees today.”
  4. “The guitars sound like two cats mating.”
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    I don’t think that’s a compliment.
  5. “I want you to know if this church fails, it’s not your fault.” 
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    Gotta love those church members with the gift of encouragement.
  6. To the pastor in the men’s restroom: “So, pastors have to go too, huh?”

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    And what did you think before this moment?
  7. “Pastor, I have some extra Vicodin. Would you like some?” 
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    Probably not, but thank you for thinking of him.
  8. “Pastor, pray for me. I’m going to Vegas.”

    via GIPHY
    I bet double or nothing he didn’t pray for her.

Yes, church members say the darnedest things. Do you have any to add?

This article originally appeared here.

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Thom S. Rainer is the president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources (LifeWay.com). Among his greatest joys are his family: his wife Nellie Jo; three sons, Sam, Art, and Jess; and six grandchildren. He was founding dean of the Billy Graham School of Missions, Evangelism, and Church Growth at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. His many books include Surprising Insights from the Unchurched, The Unexpected Journey, and Breakout Churches.