Earlier this summer, T.D. Jakes, bishop of The Potter’s House, a non-denominational megachurch in Dallas, Texas, delivered a Father’s Day message which he titled “Real Men Pour In.” In that message, Jakes set forth his belief that many societal woes can be attributed to the fact that “we are raising up women to be men.”
“Real men are not a deficit,” Jakes said at the beginning of his message. “Real men are an asset. They pour in.”
Discussing the account of creation in the book of Genesis, Jakes argued that sin entered the world because Adam broke “the divine order” of creation by allowing Eve to lead him.
“If Adam had not allowed Eve to pour into him, sin would have never come into the world. Sin came into the world because Adam broke the order,” Jakes said. “We were not designed to receive from women.”
“Your self-esteem is compromised when you have to ask your wife for lunch money,” Jakes continued. “I’m not saying you gotta be rich. I’m not saying that you gotta be famous. I’m saying that you have got to be the one who pours in, not the one who takes out. When Adam started eating out of his wife’s hand, sin came in, because the divine order was broken.”
“Women, be careful about pouring too much into us,” Jakes warned. “We are designed to pour into you. And you are designed to take what we pour into you and increase it and make it better. You increase it, you appreciate it, and you multiply it.”
“This breaks all sociological orders of the culture that we’re living in now, because we are raising up women to be men,” Jakes said.
Continuing to address women, Jakes said, “And you are not applauded for your femininity. You are applauded in the contemporary society by how tough, rough, nasty, mean, aggressive, hateful, possessive you are. And you are climbing the corporate ladder, but we are losing our families.”
“I know you can buy your own car. I know you can buy your own house. But until you create a need that I can pour into, I have no place in your life. So stop coming home bragging to me about how much you don’t need me and wonder why I shy away,” Jakes said. “The conversation has become, ‘Let’s prove to the men how dispensable they are.’ And it is borne out of pain, because we hurt you, and betrayed you, and lied to you, and cheated to you. And you became like you became out of pain.”
“That which is borne out of pain is the way you cope with disorder,” Jakes argued. “Insist for better out of me rather than replacing me.”