“When the deaths occurred, starting with my grandfather, and then my dad—and I didn’t really know my dad—and then when Karen was killed, hanging on to what I’d always seen as a kind of gift of faith, became…hollow faith,” Grammar told Fox. “It wasn’t working. I thought, ‘Why did I lose this? What happened?’ I felt betrayed by it.”
Grammer has said that the death of Karen “very nearly destroyed” him. “I was her big brother,” he said. “I was supposed to protect her—I could not. I have never gotten over it.”
Five years after the death of his sister, Grammer’s paternal half-brothers died in a scuba diving accident.
“For a long time, the grief was so dominant that I couldn’t access happiness,” Grammer told People. However, writing the memoir about his sister “helped me get to a new place with that.”
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Grammer told Fox that it was because of a session he did with a medium that he believes that Karen wanted him to share her story.
“By virtue of writing this book, [my faith] has gained a little ground,” he told Fox. “By virtue of meeting Kayte, by virtue of living through what we’ve lived through as well, has fortified my faith.”
