In my book “The Mythical Leader,” I have a whole chapter on introversion – mostly because every time I post about introversion I hear from pastors and church members who talk about how introversion negatively impacts their ministry. I have heard from well-meaning (hopefully well-meaning) people who don’t believe an introverted person can serve effectively as a pastor. But I have found this introverted pastor can be quite extroverted on Sunday.
If there was a scale of 1 to 10 of introversion – I’m probably a 7 or 8. (I can be a 9 some days.) So, I understand the plight of my introverted pastor friends, and I don’t agree with those who think introversion prohibits one from serving in a senior role. (In fact, in my book, I share some thoughts on how I think it actually makes me a better leader in some ways.)
All that said, as pastors, the interaction we have with people is a key role in growing and leading the church. I’ve written numerous times that just because I’m introverted doesn’t mean I don’t love people.
I love people. Really. I love all kinds of people. One standard I have for my ministry is whether I’m loving the people who are difficult to love. So, I strive to do so. And, I especially love to help people get excited about what God is doing in their life. That motivates me.
My introversion, however, if I’m not careful, can keep me from interacting even with people I love. The fact is, however, if you asked most people in the churches where I have served as pastor, other than those who know me really well, they are surprised I am an introvert based on my Sunday interactions with people. I may be an introverted pastor, but I’m very extroverted on Sundays.
4 Ways This Introverted Pastor is Extroverted on Sunday
1. I am very intentional in my work.
I have to work at it. I’m not saying it is easy, but is anything worthwhile ever easy? I realize that Sunday is coming. Therefore, I plan my week around it. I intentionally plan introverted moments during my week.
For example, I am very careful what I plan for Saturday night, because I know I need to be at my best for Sunday. It is rare for me to schedule a large social gathering on Saturday nights. In fact, I’ve found Cheryl and my Saturday date days are the perfect preparation for an extroverted Sunday. (Obviously that’s easier for us now as empty-nesters, but I was equally protective of my Saturday night when we had children at home.)
When I can, I try to be out of the office at least one day a week. This helps with my sermon preparation, but also gives me “down” time. Interruptions will always come, but the more intentional I am with my calendar the more prepared I am when Sunday comes.
