You’ve probably noticed how easy it is to identify other people’s problems. For most of us it’s a natural gift. We can start picking people apart at first sight without ever even having met them. What talent! 😉
So why is it so hard it is to accept when other people do the same towards us by pointing out our own problems or faults? Why do we naturally dig in our heels when someone points out an area where we’re stuck in our own ways?
If multiple people think you have an issue that you don’t think is an issue, or if someone close to you has repeatedly tried to point something out to you, it might be time to lean in and pay closer attention. You may be lacking in the very important quality of self-awareness – the ability to see yourself the way others do. And you, and those you love, may be suffering because of it.
Whether you think you are, or know you aren’t a self-aware person, here are three keys to tapping into the power of self-awareness.
Admit You Can’t Do It Alone.
If you live with someone who doesn’t have self-awareness, you know it, but they most likely don’t. This can make change very difficult.
You know how hard it is to change yourself. Now think of how hard it must be to try changing someone else.
Self-aware people are willing to admit that they need the input and advice of others in their life. And they don’t just allow it, they welcome it.
If you are not changing, you are not growing. A self-aware person is a continually changing and improving person.
Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself. (Galatians 6:2-3)
Learn to Ask the Right Questions.
People who aren’t self-aware rarely ask questions of others because they often think they already have all the answers.
As you become more self-aware, you will start to ask more questions. For example, whether as a parent, teacher, coach, pastor, or friend, a great question to ask is, “What is it like to be on the other side of me?” (What are some of my blind spots?)
Sometimes we don’t see what others see in us. We all have blind spots and we need those closest to us to help identify them. One of the best ways to do that is to humbly ask. Because the opposite of self-awareness is self-denial.