Lie #4: If I stay pure until marriage, God will reward me with amazing sex.
Many Christians assume purity guarantees fireworks on their wedding night. It doesn’t.
Five years into marriage taught me this: sex takes work. It’s beautiful and bonding, but it’s also vulnerable, awkward, and full of learning curves.
So why save sex for marriage? Because purity protects your heart from comparison and baggage. It frees you and your spouse to build intimacy without the shadows of past experiences.
That’s worth waiting for.
Lie #5: If I have sex before marriage, I’m tainted forever.
This is one of the most damaging lies in church culture. Your sexual past does not disqualify you from God’s love or future joy. God heals. God restores. God forgives completely.
Whether you made mistakes or endured abuse, you can still have a healthy marriage and a fulfilling sexual life. Shame isn’t your destiny. Redemption is.
Lie #6: If I think about sex, I’m sinning.
God created sexual desire. He doesn’t expect you to suppress it—He expects you to steward it.
Lust is sinful. Desire is natural. Lust objectifies what isn’t yours. Desire recognizes a good gift that must be kept within God’s boundaries. The failure to teach that difference has created confusion and guilt for generations.
So don’t shame yourself for having desire. And don’t indulge it carelessly. Seek accountability. Pray for self-control. Learn to handle a good gift wisely.
Lie #7: Having sex is worse than porn, masturbation or lust.
As a teenager, I believed the “big sin” was intercourse, and everything else was an acceptable loophole. Jesus says otherwise. All sexual sin flows from an impure heart, regardless of the expression.
The goal isn’t simply avoiding intercourse before marriage. The goal is a heart formed by purity, self-control, and reverence for God’s design.
Sex is a beautiful, powerful gift God created for marriage. The church needs space for honest, healthy conversations about sex—even when it’s awkward. Until we reclaim God’s vision for sex, people will continue to live with shame, confusion, and broken expectations.
What about you? Have you believed any of these lies? Let’s keep the conversation going.
To God be the glory forever. Amen.
