ChurchLeaders: Any final thoughts?
Miller: If you are someone who is aware of abuse, especially abuse involving minors, please report it to law enforcement immediately before reporting it to any other person/organization.
I’d like other survivors to know that going public is an incredibly taxing process no matter what path you take—public, private, criminal, or organizational. However, I absolutely encourage any survivor to take that step and to go as far in the system as you think you can in order for you to feel justice has been served while ensuring your wellbeing and mental health are taken care of. Surround yourself with a couple of people you know will support you in any situation. Lean on them. You’ll need them.
I have not “arrived” at some point in my journey where I can say I will be forever free from any pain the abuse or the aftermath caused me, but I want to encourage other survivors to not give up. People say, “You’re so much more than your abuse!” And I’d like to challenge that and say, “You are NOT your abuse. The abuse you endured is not you.” I promise you the light will get brighter and brighter, even if there is an emptiness even beyond the darkness surrounding you. I promise. Do not give up.
And finally, a message to Mark Aderholt, should he read this. “Mark: God is pursuing your heart just as he pursues all of ours. I pray you experience the grace you preached about for yourself. I still forgive you, and I still pray for you to find the peace and freedom that I’ve found through Christ.”
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You can read about Anne Miller’s book, Healing Together: A Guide for Supporting Sexual Abuse Survivors here.
