You need to spend less time pouring over your sermon.

Yes, get the text down. Put it in your blood, your soul. Memorize it. Read it over and again. Get a few commentaries. Be critical of them.

But when it comes down to it, the actual sermon prep shouldn’t take more than four to six hours. Maybe a couple more for writing, outlining and running it once through.

The rest of your time is spent preparing to preach. That’s more like 25 hours a week, including:

Reading Books. Read theology (which I consider to be, broadly, anything to do with the study of God). This keeps your preaching fresh, wise and strong. It gives you illustrations.

Read fiction. This teaches you how to read the 90 percent of the Bible which is narrative. It teaches expression, imagination. It gives illustrations.

Read biographies. These inspire you. They teach you human nature. They give illustrations.

Private Prayer and Study of the Word. At least an hour a day, if you’re a full-time pastor. You have to stoke those fires. You have to come to the pulpit aflame. You can’t walk up there on the crutches of a mild devotional life and 20 hours of textual gymnastics under your belt. Get yourself to know God. Bring yourself before Him. Let Him pour out to you. Your feet should be smoking by Sunday. It’ll give you illustrations.

Keeping Up With Culture. That means: reading the newspaper. Keeping up with blogs and trends. Watching the TV shows and movies your congregants are watching. Watch their sports gods and goddesses. This will teach you your people’s religion. It will teach you how to catechize them (you’ll learn their questions). It’ll give you illustrations.

The reason outlining and writing a sermon comes quickly to me is this: I always have ready application and illustration from the 25 hours a week I’ve spent OUTSIDE my text.

So put in your four to six hours to study the text. Memorize it. Soak in it. Write it out. Run it through.

But come Sunday, don’t be content with a ready sermon. Come as a ready preacher.

This article originally appeared here.

Ever feel like you’re two people? Or three?

Sometimes when I reflect on who I am, I think I just swing from one end of the emotional spectrum to the other.

I’m not talking about struggling with mental health issues or being bi-polar. I have friends who are bi-polar and who struggle with mental health issues on an ongoing basis. I feel for them and I pray for them. And although I burned out at one point in ministry, for the most part, I don’t have any ongoing mental health issues. And that subject—an important one—is a very different topic.

But sometimes if you get into the head of most leaders, it can feel a little strange and moody. This post is about the daily ups and downs and mood swings we all go through as leaders, and in particular, ministry leaders.

Been there?

One my favorite quips from Kara Powell is what she told me in this podcast interview: “Balance is something you achieve as you swing from one extreme to another.”

I still smile every time I think of that quote. So true isn’t it?

Knowing the pendulum swings of ministry and leadership can help you manage the pendulum swings of ministry and leadership.

If you don’t understand the swings involved in leadership, you’ll be tempted to quit before you should. And you’ll likely be unnecessarily confused by the challenges of ministry.

So with all that in mind, here are five mood swings I’ve experienced in ministry leadership:

1. I’m Doing an Awesome Job <———> I’m Doing an Awful Job

I realized early on in leadership that I’m really not the best judge of how I’m doing. For that reason, I’ve sought out feedback early and often.

And yet I realize that as a leader, you’re often the last to know how you’re really doing. And your self-perception can be off.

Left unchecked, I will often drift toward thinking I’m doing a better job than I am…or a worse job than I am. Neither is helpful for the team I lead.

If I think I’m doing better than I am, I ignore problems I need to deal with.

If I think I’m doing worse than I actually am, my discouragement can negatively impact the team.

To stay somewhere in the middle is ideal. Getting formal and informal feedback from people who aren’t afraid to tell you the truth is the best way to do this.

So the question is…are you getting that kind of honest, real-time feedback? If not, what could you do to solicit it?

The reality is that you’re not nearly as good as your best day or nearly as bad as your worst.

2. I’m Completely Overwhelmed <———> I’m So Bored

Leadership can be overwhelming.

I have a fairly high capacity for work, but I still find myself signing up for more projects and work than I can handle in some seasons. I’m not prone to panic, but every once in a while I get that “What on earth was I thinking??” feeling in the pit of my stomach.

Then…this almost always happens…once I get to the other side of all that work, I feel a letdown and I get bored, wondering whether I’m actually doing everything I should be doing.

I think many A type leaders can relate.

The key, of course, is to keep the challenges in balance…to load up with a healthy amount of challenge and then keep it steady.

Easier said than done. But most days…I’m not bored!

3. Things Are Going Great Personally <———> I’m in the Ditch

Of all the journeys in ministry, the emotional journey has been the most surprising and the most challenging personally.

It’s hard not to take ministry personally. Unless you really work at establishing accurate boundaries, when people leave your church, it can feel like they’re leaving you. When people criticize your message or your leadership, it can feel like they’re criticizing you. 

Add to that my drive to take on big challenges, and sometimes keeping emotional balance is a weekly…if not a daily…task. After burning out 11 years ago, I’m more sensitive to it than ever.

If you struggle to keep your personal journey healthy, I wrote this post about how to get off the emotional roller coaster of ministry. Hope it helps!

4. I Love the Church <———> I’m So Frustrated With the Church

I really love the local church. Seriously, I love it.

I hear from the critics all the time (anyone who blogs does), but they can’t deter my passion for the local church.

And I love the church I serve too. Deeply. Most days, I’m thrilled with it.

If you’re leading a church through change, or if your church needs to change, chances are you’ll spend more than a little time feeling frustrated by your church, and about your church. That’s understandable. Keep loving it, though.

If you’ve led for a while and you’re still frustrated by your church, you might discover what I’ve discovered. That I’m not frustrated with the church nearly as much as I’m frustrated with myself.

Why? Because I’m the leader. And somehow I contributed to the problem I can’t figure out how to solve.

Frustrated by your church? Change what’s frustrating you and others.

Frustrated by your church after you’ve led it for a long time? Then change yourself…you’re the one with whom you’re probably most frustrated.

5. Micromanagement <———> Abdication

Of all the pendulums that swing in my leadership, this is the one I have to manage most actively.

Our church is too big for me to manage everything. Frankly, if your church is even 50 people, it should be too big for you to manage everything.

And I can be a micromanager, especially in areas in which I’m passionate. I also happen to notice every little detail. Not so much in the things I create, but in the things other people create (I need other people to spot the typos in everything I write).

If I decide not to micromanage, I can run to the other side of the spectrum and abdicate completely, a big sign that I’m losing interest.

It’s a horribly perfect storm to create a demotivating work environment.

So I check this every day. I try to make sure I micromanage less in areas of my passion and abdicate less in areas where I really have no natural passion. That makes for a much better culture: a leader who is engaged, but not controlling; passionate, but not constantly interfering.

And yes, it’s a work in progress.

What Are Your Mood Swings?

Those are five of mine. I promise you there are more.

What about you? What are you always trying to manage?

This article originally appeared here.

If you’re a church leader who thinks strategically, you’re probably going to get criticized. Maybe even more than you ever dreamed.

For some reason, being strategic is often viewed as being unspiritual in the church. Why?

I mean, if you want the church to flounder, be unstrategic. Never use your mind, only use your heart. Never think, only feel.

Saying the church should never be strategic is like saying God wasn’t strategic when he designed the universe or even when he designed you. Everything was just random or emotional; God never invoked what we best understand as rational thought.

The truth is God showed incredible precision and unfathomable accuracy and detail when creating the galaxies.

If God created us to think, why do people criticize leaders who use their minds when leading?

It’s a real question. Talk to many Christians, and you’d think logic and strategy are the enemies of the faith. (Just read the comments scattered throughout the blog…you’ll see the mindset there.)

You know who pays the price for this? Among others, the church. Because so often, churches are poorly led as a result.

To be fair, we’ve all probably met a few church leaders who were strategic but who showed little evidence of a profound and personal relationship with Jesus. That’s just wrong, and that’s not what this post is justifying.

You can be strategic and deeply devoted to Jesus. You can think and be faithful.

However, if you’re a strategic leader, get ready.

As soon as the conversation gets specific and detailed, some people start criticizing. Here’s what you need to be prepared to hear.

Just because these phrases sound spiritual doesn’t mean they’re always helpful. And just because they’re true doesn’t mean they should shut down intelligent, prayerful discussion.

But too often, they do, and the church pays a horrible price.

1. You’re Not Trusting God Enough

So…because I’m planning and thinking, I must not be trusting God?

Trusting God doesn’t mean “my half-baked idea is good enough for God.”

It doesn’t mean “let’s just do some ill-considered thing and hope it works out.”

Trust and strategy can be and should be inherently linked.

Trust isn’t blind, and strategy isn’t bullet-proof.

When they work together (like when Paul built the early church), incredible things can happen.

Will God do more than your strategy suggests he will? Absolutely.

When I look at everything God has done in my life and leadership, he’s out-delivered my strategy a thousand times over. I’ve seen God work in me, through me and in spite of me again and again.

But I often find that leaders who have a (faithful, well-thought-out) strategy tend to do greater things in the Kingdom than leaders who don’t.

2. Just Get Back to the Gospel

Often when the conversation becomes highly strategic, someone around the table will say something like, “Just get back to the Gospel.”

Should you get back to the Gospel?

Of course. In fact, root everything you do deeply in the Gospel and be faithful to it.

Strategy—when done well—is what gives flesh to the Gospel in your context.

I can hear the critics now… The Gospel doesn’t need flesh. It doesn’t need help. It doesn’t need anything. 

I get that…but what are the critics really railing against?

I don’t think most can answer that.

And notice this: Often the critics who speak the loudest are accomplishing little for the Gospel in their lives.

They’re not leading anyone. They may leave critical comments on a blog or write angry emails to church leaders, but who’s following them? (Other than maybe five people who write letters/leave comments with them?)

Who are they leading to Christ?

What are they building?

What seeds are they sowing other than seeds of dissension?

The spiritual gift of criticism is not a spiritual gift.

Do we need to get back to the Gospel? Absolutely. But the Gospel is as much about moving forward as it as about moving back.

So keep moving forward.

3. The Scripture Says….

Ah…scripture wars.

These are so hard.

When I was a young leader, I tried to justify all my actions with scripture.

But you know what? Often that’s exactly what people try to do when they keep quoting scripture verses: justify their actions.

And when you try to explain your position using a series of scripture verses, guess what someone who disagrees with you will do? The same thing.

And you end up with a scripture war.

I’m not sure that’s why God gave us the scriptures.

Again, every strategy you propose or adopt should be entirely consistent with Scripture and genuinely biblical, but too often Christians will try to use scriptural principles to attack preferences with which they disagree.

Often, strategy comes down to preference.

One person likes this kind of music; another prefers a different style.

Someone likes a more traditional architecture; someone else prefers something far more modern.

One group likes a church with programs running five nights a week; another prefers a simpler model.

I’m not sure scripture should be used to justify our preferences. Biblically, there is freedom on certain issues. And biblically, there is always love.

Sadly, too many strategic conversations go down in the flames of Scripture wars.

And when we do that, don’t we play right into the enemy’s hands? As shocking as it sounds, the scripture sometimes gets used as a weapon against God. (Satan tried this with Jesus.)

All we do as Christian leaders should be deeply biblical and scripturally sound.

It isn’t wise or helpful to use the Bible to beat each other up or shut down needed discussions.

4. The Church Is Not a Business, You Know

You’re not a CEO, you know. And the church is not a business.

I’ve heard this many times.

Critics who say this are quite right—and very wrong.

The sentiment underneath this criticism suggests the church has nothing to learn from the business world.

Again, without getting into the scripture wars outlined above, you don’t have to read the scriptures very deeply before you encounter organizational leadership in the life of Moses (who couldn’t handle millions of people by himself), or David’s skillful building of a nation, or Jesus’ organization of his followers into a group of 70, 12, three and one, or the early church’s reorganization after explosive initial growth.

As much as it makes some people wince, historical Christianity has always been about corporate strategy because it has always been corporate (from the Latin corpus as in body).  

Anyone who cares about people has to care about organizing people, reaching people and caring for people.

Sadly, the business world has become better at it in many cases than the church. Companies use advanced strategies to make something as shallow and fleeting as profit.

What if the church used that level of strategic thinking to reach people and make disciples?

Think about strategy when it comes to tackling one of the biggest obstacles facing churches today: breaking the 200 attendance mark. (I wrote about why 80 percent of churches never break that barrier here.)

Most churches fail to break the 200 attendance barrier, but it has nothing to do with their…

Desire. Most leaders I know want their church to reach more people.

A lack of prayer. Many small church leaders are incredibly faithful in prayer.

Love. Some of the people in smaller churches love people as authentically as anyone I know.

Facility. Growth can start in the most unlikely places.

You know why most churches don’t push past the 200 mark in attendance?

You ready?

They organize, behave, lead and manage like a small organization.

There’s a world of difference between how you organize a corner store and how you organize a larger supermarket.

In a corner store, Mom and Pop run everything. Want to talk to the CEO? She’s stocking shelves. Want to see the director of marketing? He’s at the cash register.

Mom and Pop do everything, and they organize their business to stay small. Which is fine if you’re Mom and Pop and don’t want to grow.

But you can’t run a supermarket that way. You organize differently. You govern differently. There is a produce manager and there are people who only stock shelves. There’s a floor manager, shift manager, general manager and so much more.

That’s just one tiny example of how better thinking (things we can learn from the wider world) can transform the church’s mission today.

To say you don’t want to organize the body of Christ well is to say you don’t care about Christ’s body.

5. Just Pray About It

We should absolutely pray about all of the decisions we make, organizationally and personally. I am full on for prayer.

But often in the context of a meeting, ‘just pray about it’ becomes the ultimate shut-down move.

“Just pray about it” translates to “let’s not make a decision.”

Or it means “let’s defer that…forever.”

Or, even worse, ‘just pray about it’ suggests that if you actually prayed about it, you would realize like all the spiritual people do that God would not approve.

Really? Just because something sounds spiritual doesn’t mean it’s from God. In fact, sometimes that’s the best way to shut down the mission of the church: make it sound spiritual, and then kill all forward momentum.

Should you pray about your decision? Absolutely.

But when you pray, remember that prayer and thought are not mutually incompatible.

In fact, they should go hand in hand. The best prayers bring your heart and your mind before God. They bring all of you and everything you’re dealing with before Christ.

So…by all means, pray about it. Pray about it deeply. Bring all of your plans before God.

But then act.

Don’t let people who say ‘just pray about it’ kill the mission of the very church God created.

Do You Think Strategically? Join Us for Rethink Leadership 2017!

If you do like to think strategically (like I do) join me at Rethink Leadership in April. We’ll be working through key church leadership issues like strategy, momentum, culture, team and personal leadership.

Speakers for this year include Bob Goff, Les McKeown, Danielle Strickland, Reggie Joiner, Brad Lomenick, Jud Wilhite, Jon Acuff, Kara Powell, Darius Wise, Les McKeown and more. Plus, I’ll be there speaking and hosting. If you’re a senior pastor, executive pastor or campus pastor, you’re invited. March 16 is the final day to get the best rates.

Again, if you’re not a senior church leader, register instead for the Orange Conference in Atlanta. I’ll be at both events, and I’d love for you to join me.

You can still save on regular rates by registering now!

What Have You Heard?

I realize this post probably pushes the buttons of a lot of people in the church. I get that.

I’m just trying to move the needle on the church’s mission by pushing past some of the arguments that—as noble as they sound—aren’t actually helping anyone.

What are some objections to strategic thinking that you’ve heard?

This article originally appeared here.

Over the past few weeks I have been reading through The Lord of the Rings, slowly meandering my way through Middle Earth for the umpteenth time. Every time I read the books, I find myself drawn to something different, some new demonstration of Tolkien’s brilliance. One of the strengths that distinguishes his work from other fantasy is its depth. Tolkien did not simply write a story, he created a world. Before he wrote characters and narrative, he created mythology, planets, races, languages and history. As we read about a small fellowship saving the world from peril, we realize that their actions are the culmination of thousands and tens of thousands of years. It is in their actions that races converge, that prophecies are fulfilled, that ages end and begin again.

In this reading, I have found myself especially impressed by the history of Middle Earth, and I rate this as one of Tolkien’s great successes. But it’s not merely that Tolkien obsessively created a history in its finest details, but that he faithfully sets his characters within it. He makes them small but significant players in a much wider, grander drama. They are always aware of those who have gone before and always thinking of those who will follow. The characters do not stand alone in the story, but always in the shadow of their forebears.

In this way, the narrative often unfolds slowly, looking forward and looking back. Even when there has been the drama of fast-paced action, Tolkien will often slow it right back down. This wonderful, plodding little passage follows close after a chaotic battle:

‘No, you do not understand,’ said Gimli. ‘No dwarf could be unmoved by such loveliness. None of Durin’s race would mine those caves for stones or ore, not if diamonds and gold could be got there. Do you cut down groves of blossoming trees in the springtime for firewood? We would tend these glades of flowering stone, not quarry them. With cautious skill, tap by tap—a small chip of rock and no more, perhaps, in a whole anxious day—so we could work, and as the years went by, we should open up new ways, and display far chambers that are still dark, glimpsed only as a void beyond fissures in the rock. And lights, Legolas! We should make lights, such lamps as once shone in Khazad-dûm; and when we wished we would drive away the night that has lain there since the hills were made; and when we desired rest, we would let the night return.

One of the great strengths of Tolkien’s work is its grounding in history. One of the great weaknesses of the contemporary church is its detachment from its own history. Few of today’s Christians have a clear sense of how the church came to be. They know of Acts and Reformation and Billy Graham, but the rest is a blur. They do not know their forebears, the ones who faithfully proclaimed and finally handed down the faith. They have no grounding in history—their own history.

This is not universally true, of course. I have been among some who cling tightly to their history—Reformed Presbyterians who love the Covenanters, Anglicans who esteem Cranmer and many of his contemporaries, Dutch Reformed believers who honor the men who framed their confessions. (I even went to one of their schools, Guido de Brès High School in Hamilton.) But for many others, they are completely unmoored from the past.

There are many reasons we ought to teach believers their history. History gives us purpose. History gives us hope. History gives us theological grounding. But as much as anything, history reminds us that we live in the shadow of those who have come before and that those who follow will, in turn, look back to us.

The characters in The Lord of the Rings know they are set within a wider drama that began ages prior and will continue ages hence. They are determined to act in ways that honor their forebears and leave a worthy example for their descendants. Their valor is motivated by their understanding that history has called them to this time, this place and this set of circumstances. Their nobility is inseparable from their history. They speak and live as if every word of the mouth and every tap of the hammer will honor or dishonor those who have gone before and shame or bless those who will follow.

We’d do well to learn from their example. We, too, need to set believers within their history. We, too, need to teach them they are small but significant players in a much wider, grander drama. They must always be aware of those who have gone before and always think of those who will follow. They do not stand alone in the story, but always in the shadow of their forebears. What Tolkien did so well is what we do so poorly.

This article originally appeared here.

Have you ever experienced traction at your church? It’s a beautiful thing. Stuff just seems to work better at every turn. People invite more friends. Folks move from just attending your church to actually joining a team or getting into a small group. Your people fund the mission at levels that actually allow you to make a dent in your mission dreams. Your church moves forward.

You want your church to have traction, but what do you need to “do” to get it? What if there was just one thing you could do that would help you gain more traction? What if by doing this one thing stuff would start to click and your church would move forward?

There is one thing your church can do. It’s simple to say but hard to live out. It’s straightforward to understand but is exacting to implement.

Narrow the focus.

Focusing on a just a few things in a wide variety of areas of your ministry will give you more traction. Do less with more intensity. By focusing your effort on just a few things your ministry will move forward because your effort won’t be diffused. What does narrowing the focus look like in your ministry? Here are some suggestions for you to talk over with your team…

Narrow the Focus in Church Communications

• Only Allow One Announcement. What if you only talked about one thing on Sunday morning outside of the message and offering? When you give your people a variety of “asks” to participate in, they can’t keep them straight and opt out of everything. It’s just a fact that humans can only retain so much information at a time. When you ignore this fact and pepper your people with a variety of opportunities, they can’t retain information about any of them and don’t take action. The task of working with your team to understand what is the most important step you want people to take coming out of your services is a healthy conversation for your team and will give them clarity as they attempt to move your church forward.
• Focus the Bulletin on Guests. Do you hand out a bulletin or program to people at your church? Do people really read it? What if you put an ad in there stating that the first five people who email in get a $5 gift certificate a favorite local coffee shop? It’s humbling how few people read it enough to get free coffee! The program is great for first time guests arriving at your church because they want to know what your church is all about. What if you remade the entire bulletin with just your guests in mind? Tell them what they need to know about your church and help them take their first steps into community.
• Reduce Your Social Media Channels. Every social network has its own culture and best practices. In a mad scramble to be relevant to more people, churches will often cross post from one network to another or make a halfhearted attempt to be on “every social network” possible. This diffusion means you aren’t getting leverage on any one channel. Pick a social network that your community is already showing signs of traction with and double down on that. Follow other organizations that are gaining traction on that network and mimic what they do. Read books and listen to podcasts from other industries that are leveraging that network and see what you could apply from those lessons. Resist the temptation to “cross post” from one network to another. Don’t move to another network until you are seeing measurable impact on your ministry.

Narrow the Focus in Your Church Programming

• Sing Fewer Songs. When talking to lots of worship or creative arts people in churches they will often bemoan the fact that their community doesn’t sing enough during weekend services. In fact, sometimes these complaints will come across as condescending against the communities we are serving. We point fingers at our people and why “they” don’t engage in worship. The fact is that only worship leaders listen to worship music a lot. The music people in our churches are the only people that know about the latest music that’s coming out and feel anxiety to add those songs to our weekend services. The people at our churches don’t sing because they don’t know the music we’re leading. We need to reduce the total variety of songs we’re singing so people can catch on to the song. Don’t believe me? Even in the hippest musically driven worship-culture churches, the audience participation is at the highest during Christmas when they are singing Christmas tunes. Worship leaders can’t stand that music but people actually know it. Reduce the temptation to move on to new music. Linger longer on a smaller number of songs so your people will catch on.
• Cut Programming. Is your church suffering from “programming bloat”? Are there things your church is doing that once made sense but are no longer effective? Are there areas of your ministry that you find yourself and other leaders needing to generate enthusiasm about or are simply faking being interested in? It’s time to trim the fat and cut back on what you’re doing. Prevailing churches are often defined more by what they don’t do than what they do. They’ve chosen to focus on a few things and do those few things well. If you continue to say “yes” to some extraneous program, you are saying “no” to those resources going to your core programs. Although there will be short-term pain in cutting back on some things, there is long term gain from the momentum you’ll add to your church.
• Ask More People to Serve More. Prevailing churches understand that a critical part of building community is getting people plugged into volunteering. In fact, effective churches are always looking to develop more volunteer roles for people to plug into. There can be a temptation in churches to “lower the bar” and make it easy for people to serve by only asking them to come in once every few months. This low level of commitment does a disservice to your people because it’s a pathway to them being less connected to the church. Increase your total volunteer roles by adding new functions to what your church does, and ensure that roles require people to serve more frequently or with more intensity. People want to be wanted. Ensure the roles you craft for people so they know how important they are!

Narrow the Focus in Your Personal Life

• Set a Weekly Rhythm. What is essential to get done every week? Build a rhythm around that. As I’ve looked at leaders who have tremendous impact, their lives are often built around repeating rhythms. They focus their energy on those tasks that push the mission forward on a regular basis. Their weeks aren’t just a series of haphazard time slots, but are pre-defined energy bursts around those areas that make the biggest impact in their ministry. What do you need to make sure pushes the ministry forward on a regular basis? Build your weekly, monthly, quarterly and annual schedule around those areas that make the biggest difference.
• Understand Your “One Big Thing.” What’s one thing that you could do that makes everything else become easier or unnecessary? All leaders need a clear picture of what their highest priority item is at any given time and they need to focus their time and effort on that “one thing.” One of the biggest gifts you can give to your team is helping them define what their “one thing” is and then hold them accountable to work on it. We all have an area of utmost importance that we need to keep focused on over time to create the most leverage.
• Cut Out Meetings. Meetings aren’t the work of the church. They are organizing people to do the work of the church, and so we can be tempted to think they are work. They aren’t. You are probably doing too many meetings with your people. What if you experimented and cut back the length of all your “normal meetings” by 50 percent for a month and saw what happened? What if rather than just saying yes to every meeting request that came your way, you paused and asked if the purpose of the meeting could be accomplished in another way?

Where else do you need to narrow the focus?

I’d love to hear what other areas you are considering narrowing the focus on in your ministry. How are you looking to reduce friction by doing less? Leave a comment on the blog or email me any time!

This article originally appeared here.

I interact regularly with young, ambitious and busy men. They are regular attendees, members and aspiring leaders in my church. They have young families with two, three, sometimes four children. Many of them commute over two hours to New York City for work, leaving the house before 6 a.m. and getting home after 8 p.m.

How do you disciple them?

How do you disciple these busy men, especially, if you are a young pastor yourself? How do you actually develop busy men as leaders when you have two, three and, sometimes, four children? What about when you’re overloaded with hospital visits, small groups and sermon preparation? Here are four ways.

How to Disciple Busy Men—4 Ways

1. Reach Out Digitally

Technology is a fact of life now. So why not use technology to grow men in Christ? If you’re not able to reach out in person, why not connect through technology? Face-to-face meetings will be limited. Use calls, texts and social media to bring God’s Word into their lives.

Even if you’re not on social media, you can still use technology to reach men. You can share Bible verses through text message, or email short devotionals. Use any and every digital means available to get God’s Word before the eyes of men. They need it.

2. Enlist Older Men

If you’re a pastor with young children, you need to be home at night. You must safeguard Saturdays too, since Sunday is a workday. As a pastor with a young family, needing to be home at nights and Saturdays creates a time crunch for discipleship.

Do you know when busy men are available for discipleship? Nights and weekends!

How do you disciple young men without destroying your family? Enlist older men. Older men who are more advanced in their careers, empty nesters and retirees have a lot to offer the church by way of time and experience. Being more advanced in their careers, older men may make their own schedule. Empty nesters, on the other hand, do not have the responsibility of raising children any longer. Retirees are ripe to be employed in service of discipleship, so long as time with grandchildren is respected!

If you take the time to resource and equip a few older men, they can, in turn, meet with younger men who have more limited schedules.

3. Equip Them for Family Worship

Young men play a significant role in the discipleship of their own families. They are head of their homes and the primary disciple makers of their children (Ephesians 5:22-33; Deuteronomy 6:4-9). It is also true that you only really know something if you can teach it to someone else. A man having to teach his young children the Bible is also one of the best opportunities for him to grow in his understanding of Scripture too!

So take the time to give them quality resources to lead family worship. Don Whitney’s book is a great place to start. Ask your children’s ministry workers to develop a list of resources that parents can use for their children at every stage. Make these resources easily available: post about them on your website, set up a book table near your children’s classrooms, give them away freely. You may also want to host an annual parenting conference at your church. Busy men may not be able to meet weekly, but they just might carve out one weekend a year to be equipped.

4. Rest in God’s Means of Grace

The Protestant Reformers argued for two marks of a true church: the correct preaching of God’s Word and the proper administration of the sacraments. For the Reformers, the foundational piece of Christian discipleship was the corporate, gathered worship of God. Furthermore, participating in corporate worship is commanded in Scripture (Hebrews 10:25). Many evangelicals might be surprised that daily devotions are not!

Therefore, having men in the Sunday morning worship service counts. It counts as time in the Word. It counts as a time of prayer. It counts. It is essential and foundational for their discipleship. So rest in the fact that men will be discipled as they faithfully attend Sunday worship.

How are You Discipling Busy Men?

This article originally appeared here.

Dear Pastor,

I have thought a long time about whether I should write this letter to you. You know that I’m not one to complain. But after talking it over with five or 10 other folks in the congregation and realizing that some people had similar concerns, I thought you had the right to know. Below are some suggestions to consider.

First, we need to talk about your upcoming vacation. The last time you went out of town, you didn’t respond to any emails, which was pretty disappointing. We didn’t feel we could reach you in a timely fashion, and I’m sure you agree that it’s not good if a flock can’t reach their shepherd. We’re happy you’re able to get away with your family, but we don’t want you to forget your responsibility to us. Jesus said the church was more important than family, remember. So we want you to have a good time and relax—you deserve it!—but please pay better attention to your inbox and voicemails.

Second, it’s come to our attention that last week when one of our dear sisters was visiting in your home she noticed your children were playing games on computer tablets. You know that sister doesn’t like nosing around, but she knows that they are fairly pricey. Your finances are none of our business, of course, but please consider how this looks.

I heard you were thinking about buying a newer car too, and you should probably know people are talking about that. Just want you to be aware.

Generally speaking, we think you’re doing a great job. But there are some areas of improvement we’ve noticed. Here are some suggestions we came up with for you:

– We want you to be very humble and transparent, but don’t make us uncomfortable. Some things shouldn’t be talked about.

– We want you to be readily available to the congregation, but we don’t want you to think you’re too important. You should be available 24/7 like any good pastor, but don’t get a big head about it.

– We want you to be confident and “take charge,” but not bossy or arrogant.

– We want you to be tender and sympathetic, but not weak or whiney.

– We want you to be very theologically knowledgeable, but not too bookish.

(We have a list of “suggestions” for your preaching, but will send separately.)

Almost finally, some of us have had growing concerns about all this talk about “reaching people.” We know that our Lord has called us to preach the gospel to everybody, but all your emphasis on evangelism and mission and “reaching out beyond our church walls” seems premature since there are some of us inside the walls who feel like we don’t get enough ministry from you. If people want to hear about Jesus, they know where our church is, and they are welcome any time. But in my last three churches, the pastor did this same kind of talk, and before you knew it, people started coming—people with all kinds of issues and baggage—and, frankly, the place changed. It wasn’t ever the same with all those new people and their needs and problems. It stopped feeling like a tight-knit family. I really don’t want that to happen at our church, and others agree.

While we’ve got you here, we need to let you know that another sister is very hurt that she has not been invited to tea with your wife. I know your wife is a shy person, but she is a pastor’s wife, which means she can’t just spend her time with two or three friends. She has to be friends with everybody.

We really do want the best for you, which is why we felt like you needed to know these things. With a little more hard work and concentrated effort on your part, this can be a win-win for all of us.

In Him,

A Concerned Member

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Dear Concerned Church Member,

I received your letter with great interest, as I’m always grateful for the sharpening of my skills, knowledge and, of course, personality. I know I always have room to improve as a pastor.

Some of your concerns were, naturally, disappointing and discouraging. In a few areas, I already knew I needed improvement, so the criticism was not a surprise to me, but nevertheless confirms some of my own worst opinions about myself! I don’t know if you know what that’s like—being your own worst critic—but I gently suspect not. In any event, I am trying to “test all things” here and cling to what is good. If I may, some responses to specific concerns:

– On my last vacation I responded to emails as best I could. This was a huge mistake. It kept me from “unplugging” and being present with my wife and children with undivided attention. I would like to humbly suggest that if the church can’t live without me for a week, it is barely a church to begin with and perhaps more like a religious daycare center. You are all (mostly) grown-ups and some of you have been Christians a long time. It is Jesus who is available to you 24/7, and I’m not him. Any messages that are not emergencies I’d be glad to respond to when I return. In the meantime, I will maintain radio silence while on vacation so I can rest, recharge and return to you all with renewed energy.

– Yes, my children have new iPads. Sister was not mistaken to notice those in our home. They were gifts from grandparents. I confess it didn’t occur to me to think about “how it might look” to someone, especially someone who had been invited into our home as a guest and shown hospitality, but if it had, my hope would’ve been that we’d be given the benefit of the doubt and not have assumptions made about the situation, still less assumptions that were shared with others and not with us directly. (Just as an “FYI,” we are buying our kids the latest XBox this Christmas. You are welcome to come play on it with us.)

– In regards to your concerns about “reaching people,” I have quite a few thoughts, as I’m sure you can imagine, but the words of Christ should suffice: “Go and make disciples of all peoples.” When our church begins to exist only for its members, it begins dying. I love our church and all its members and want to provide the best care I possibly can for them, but I confess I am not interested in ministering in a pasture that has no concern for the “other sheep” Jesus talked about in John 10:16 and whom he said we must bring in. If our church is going to grow—which is what you asked me to lead when you hired me—it will change. It’s impossible for a church to grow and not change. It’s possible, brother, that your desire for our church never to change is a selfish one and not godly.

– Finally, I am not in the habit of telling my wife who she can and can’t be friends with. As a mature Christian, she feels led by God to be friendly with everybody. But she’s a grown woman and, like any other woman (or man) in the church, is free to be close friends with whoever she feels most heard and loved by and connected with.

All that to say, I am glad you have felt the freedom to trust me with these concerns. I know I’m not perfect and I am always open to constructive criticism. I do feel that some of these concerns mentioned are not appropriate, and a few of them revelatory of some pretty serious idolatry.

Since you did not sign your letter and most everyone you mentioned has gone unidentified—the infamous church choir known as “some people”—I am not quite sure who to respond to. Anonymous complaints are very difficult to get used to,  I must say. It’s like getting punched with a bag over your head. It taints every relationship I try to have in the church, honestly, because I never know if the person I’m ministering to is someone I can trust with my heart or someone who has no compunction about sharing criticism of me with third parties behind my back. Therefore, because I cannot respond to you directly, I am posting this letter to the bulletin board in the fellowship hall. See “you” at the next potluck!

In Him,

Pastor

This article originally appeared here.

That which gets celebrated very quickly becomes embedded in your culture. 

If you celebrate teamwork, then collaboration will become a part of the culture. If you celebrate treating one another with kindness, then compassion will become a part of the culture.

But it’s possible you could be holding celebrations for accomplishments that could actually be undermining a healthy culture.

Here are three accomplishments that don’t always deserve celebration:

Working Long Hours

Leaders who “high five” those who slog their way through the much-vaunted “80-hour work week” are not necessarily embedding the value they think they are.

Long hours at work have been thought by some to be the gold-standard when it comes to hard work and determination.

But long hours can also point to poor time management, poor work-life balance and general inefficiencies.

Rather than celebrating long working hours, better to celebrate “working until the job gets done.”

Coming in Way Under-Budget

Who wouldn’t want to see a department, project or manager exercise strong fiscal responsibility?

In most cases, under-spending a budget is laudable.

But be careful. Sometimes an under-spent budget can be a sign of inactivity; that not enough investment is taking place on key drivers.

The point is, don’t automatically assume that every un-spent dollar is worth a celebration.

Hitting the Numbers

This one requires explanation.

We all want to see targets being reached. But don’t be too quick to high-five every sales figure or attendance total. To be of any value, a number needs a context.

What is the comparison to last year? To last quarter? To last month?

Numbers can be made to sound very impressive. And, given the right context, sometimes numbers should be celebrated.

Just be sure you’re not actually celebrating a downward trend.

The old expression goes, “What gets measured gets done.” But more accurately, “What gets celebrated gets done.” When a leader makes a big deal over an accomplishment or behavior, that’s how a culture is formed.

So watch what you celebrate.

Because an unhealthy celebration can quickly lead to an unhealthy culture.

This article originally appeared here.