Feel like you want to punch someone? Or at least not deal with them anymore?
What do you do when the person in question goes to your church?
How do you handle that tension when you’re a … Christian?
Christian Conflict Resolution
It’s strange, but being a Christian doesn’t automatically make you good at conflict resolution. In fact, many Christians and many churches are terrible at it.
Unresolved—or poorly resolved—conflict sinks a lot of potential in the church. It also causes thousands of staff and volunteers to leave every year. And it makes millions of church goers simply miserable.
Fun, isn’t it?
Chances are you already know exactly what I’m talking about. Even better. You know exactly who I’m talking about.
In the United States alone, 70 percent of the people who will go to work today will tell you they don’t like their jobs. I don’t think that’s just an American issue. It’s a people issue.
So many people I know get frustrated at work. And one of the top frustrations?
The people they work with.
Ditto for the church world (no stat … I’ve just visited enough churches to feel comfortable saying that).
Sometimes the people we’re most frustrated with are the people we work with (staff and volunteers) and the people we worship with.
How do you fix that without becoming a jerk or letting the tension simmer unresolved?
Why Do Christians Struggle With Conflict Resolution So Much?
Before we jump to how to resolve conflict, let’s understand why we have it.
First, on this side of heaven conflict is inevitable. But that said, here’s why I think Christians often struggle with conflict:
In the name of grace, Christians sacrifice truth.
In the name of truth, Christians sacrifice grace.
We worry about hurting other people’s feelings when really one of the best things we can do is offer honest feedback.
And in the end, we’re not sure how to support someone we genuinely disagree with; we swing the extremes: We avoid the situation or we blow it up.
None of that needs to be.
