Pastors on Easter Be Like…

It’s that time of year where many churches are “ramping down” from the weekend of Easter.  Extra practice for the Cantata is over, the shopping for the Easter dress or tie is but a memory, and all the Easter eggs have been hunted. There is a collective exhale from pastors and church staffs as they enjoy a brief respite until Mother’s Day.

Now that Easter season has come and gone this year, perhaps now you can laugh at the video John Crist put together that takes a humorous and slightly sarcastic view of the chaos that leads up to is Easter services in a lot of churches.

Like a ringmaster at a circus, imagine a pastor barking out a bunch of craziness like…

… Shuttles and golf carts in the parking lot… NOW!

…Has everyone shared our graphically designed Easter invitation on their Instagram? This is for the Kingdom!

…Who is trimming these hedges?? A youth intern??.. for Heaven’s sake!!

…We don’t have ministry time, but we do have a petting zoo outside.

…Connect cards, connect cards, and connect cards!

…Do we have the right mixture of haze in the fog machine?

…We don’t need new members, but do we have the rose petals in the visitor parking spaces?

…We are pro-Jesus and pro-Easter Bunny!

…Donuts? Check! Coffee? Check!

… Gluten free communion, fat free communion, whole thirty communion, vegan communion, paleo communion, non-GMO communion

…Everyone needs to have their phones out because I will have some very tweetable quotes this morning.

…The Easter basket is full but the tomb is empty!

…God can put your life back together if it’s in pieces, but some of you all are focused on Reeses

…We need more diversity up on that stage!

…No! The youth pastor cannot do the announcements.

…Remember that one minority guy that came that one time?  Can we get him to do the announcements?

…We don’t want visitors to feel uncomfortable at any time but we will ask them to fill out a        connect card along with their kids’ names and ages

…I don’t care what size the stage is! I need a rapper, a full choir, and six men dressed as Roman centurions.

…Why would you even ask about the worship set list? It’s Jesus Paid It All, In Christ Alone, and Christ is Risen!

…Can we get that other worship leader who is a little more attractive?

…Is this the best greeting team we have?  Who trained these people? Please, can you please not be weird? Can we put her near the auxiliary door?

…Quit your ministry and please move these people out of here! We have another service starting in fifteen minutes!

…Please do not put pressure on our visitors to give, but please invite them back so they can be here for our new series on giving.

Aren’t we glad that the real account of Easter is one of God who came in the flesh, lived the life for us that we could never live, to pay a debt that we could never pay, and to rise from the dead having victory over our sin. That, my friend, is good news to receive in the midst of the tragic chaos of our sin and our modern-day worship practices.