Can you imagine a baseball announcer encouraging the fans to greet one another after singing “Take Me Out to the Ballgame”? Or can you visualize the orchestra concertmaster asking you to find someone you don’t know to shake hands with after the second movement of a Mahler Symphony? How about asking worshipers to shake hands after the opening song at church?
The worship service Meet and Greet can cause anxiety sweats and heart palpitations for first-time guests and congregational introverts. Some see that service element as shallow, contrived and intimidating. So have you ever wondered if it’s actually serving its purpose? What do you think most people are really thinking during this service ritual? These 10 awkward handshakes might just give it away.
The Sweaty Palm
What he might be thinking: We’re getting ready to sing a Tomlin song in its original key.
What he might be thinking: I should’ve gotten the solo on the opening song.
What she might be thinking: I got the solo on the opening song.
The Dead Fish
What he might be thinking: I’d rather be golfing so I’m saving my grip for 18 holes after the service.
What he might be thinking: Maybe I can get him to serve on the building and grounds committee.
The Stiff Armer
What she might be thinking: Don’t ask me to serve on anything.
The Grip and Puller
What he might be thinking: I haven’t forgotten about your hard slide in the softball game yesterday.
The Hand Hugger
What she might be thinking: A non-verbal “bless your heart,” meaning I know your sins better than you do.
What he might be thinking: I still have Larry Norman and Stryper in my play list.
The Fist Bumper
What he might be thinking: I didn’t see a lot of hand washing at the pre-service restroom meet and greet.