Sex is not sexy. The physical act will never satisfy you once and for all. Read on for insights on helping young people understand God’s true purpose behind the gift of sex.
Sex is not sexy. During my second year at Bible college, I first had this mini-revelation about the purpose of sex.
Like most young red-blooded Americans (especially of the virgin persuasion), I had a notion that marriage and sex would assuage all feelings of emptiness and quell all my desires. I looked forward to finding and marrying that one person who would satisfy me once and for all. As I’ve written, I awoke from that misguided belief and cultivated more realistic expectations.
One night in college, the seeds of this realization first took root. I had grabbed a couch from a Chicago sidewalk and used it as my bed for an entire school year. At the time, I was reading Lauren Winner’s book Real Sex, which argues for a holistic and healthy view of sex and chastity. So the topic was heavy on my mind. I was grappling with whether to continue pursuing a certain girl, and on that tattered couch-bed it hit me.
The Purpose of Sex
Sex will not satisfy me once and for all. This ethereal entity that seemed like a haven of ecstasy and satisfaction would leave me no more permanently satisfied than a good meal fills up my stomach for good. Give it enough time and the well runs dry again.
This thing which, since middle school, had seemed like the finish line to the human race would not satisfy me forever. I remember the scene playing out in my imagination. I imagined marriage to a woman. Regardless of how beautiful and (ahem) sexy, after the act I’d be in the same place I was in reality. Just trying to fall asleep, get a good night’s sleep, and go on with life.
The act of sex would not permanently fill the elusive voids within my soul. After the act, physically speaking of course, I’d be content for a while. But life would continue madly on, and the urge would return. I realized it isn’t a permanent fix-all for whatever ails the insides of me.
You could say I realized sex is not sexy. I mean, what terms come to mind when we think of the word sexy? Isn’t it some sort of glamorous, polished and unrealistic ideal we constantly seek but never actually grasp?
Why Sexy Disappoints
Sexy is arousing.
Sexy smells nice. It doesn’t have morning breath or hangnails.
Sexy is airbrushed. It may or may not have had some cosmetic surgery.
